Yes I know what you’re thinking, “There are more things I shouldn’t say to an infertile couple?! I guess I better just shut my mouth.” And let me respond by saying we appreciate any action of love and support. These are just some things that I hear way too often and they are not helpful. While I try not to take personal offense to them and know that the sayer only means well, they’re still things that would be best to avoid.
1. “Well I can relate because it took me four months to conceive and that seemed like a really long time.”
Sorry, that’s not relatable. Any length of time under a year is considered normal.
2. “I don’t believe in conceiving any other way than naturally.”
For many infertile couples that’s not a choice. Let them choose what’s best for them, medical intervention or not.
3. “You should just adopt and then you’ll get pregnant.”
There is no logic in this statement. First, adopting isn’t something you “just” do. It’s a complicated, expensive and long process. Second, why would your infertility magically be cured because you adopted?
4. “Speaking of babies, did you know so and so is pregnant?”
Thanks for bringing that to my attention and making me feel a little worse.
5. “Kids are so expensive!”
Yes, I know. But the conception of your child was free and it’s costing us our entire life savings.