Ever since my first son was born, I knew that my family would not be complete until we had boys and girls. It was just something I have always felt in my heart.
With my second pregnancy, everyone was sure I was having a girl. All the signs and wives tales pointed at a penis free child, and we couldn’t be more shocked when we learned he was all boy. Don’t get me wrong, I love my two son’s more than anything in this world, and I would not trade them for a little girl. I love being the mother of boys, but something inside me still knows I need a little girl in my life. Heck, the last little girl in our family was ME!
We decided that we will choose to find out the sex when we go for our 18-20 week anatomy scan on December 9th. But it still seems like eternity. Especially knowing in the back of our minds that this is going to be the last baby joining our family. A friend of mine is also in the same position right now. Gina to me, but The Feminist Breeder to most others described the way I feel to a T in her post I’ve Decided How I Want to Find out the Sex on Wednesday.
The more I read, the more I shook my head in agreement. The more she was telling the same story I would be telling, and it sparked me to make some extreme comments about the gender of this child. I am not even going to wait till the ultrasound, I am just going to insist now, this is a little girl, and have already started to design her nursery in my head.
I know that there are a lot of people out there who will just say, you get what you get, and you don’t get upset but knowing this is probably our last chance for pink,ruffle butts, and tu-tu’s… I can’t help to be the bigger person and admit, if we have a third boy, I will be disappointed. It is human nature.
Will I love my child just as much as I love my other kids? You bet your ass!
Will I long for another child secretly? Probably.
Will I screw my child up for life telling him I wish he was a girl? No way.
But it is what it is.
There needs to stop being so much judgment of pregnant women when they are disappointed with something. Whether it be gender, opportunity, health problems, or delivery.