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Operation ‘Give Husband Baby Fever’: An Overdue Update

By Devan McGuinness |

It’s been a while since I’ve updated on our ‘family feud’ — the baby fever that I have been infected with for nearly a year and my attempts to infect the husband with it too. We have three beautiful children together, but no matter how much I tried to quiet the biological clock’s ticking, the more I realized it just wasn’t going to go away.

First, we would just talk a lot about why I wanted another child. Could it be confused with grief over our losses? Could it be that I missed being pregnant and wanted to experience it just one more time? Or was it truly something speaking to me — the feeling our family wasn’t complete. We talked – a lot. He wasn’t opposed to the idea of another child, maybe — he just didn’t feel that same desire as me. Fair enough. But, he never said no and he wasn’t comfortable saying, “No, never” and get something permanent done, so the door stayed open.

He wasn’t feeling the idea of another child … so ‘operation give husband baby fever‘ was started.

I started dropping the way-too-cute-to-resist newborn socks on his computer, in his lunch for work — everywhere. Thinking the tiny socks for tiny feet would get him thinking about babies.

When that didn’t make progress in giving him the fever, I tried something more ‘in his face’. I started to randomly send him photos of his children as babies, of his life with them — the happy they bring. Complete with adorable captions that I thought was bound to bring on his baby fever, I sent them to him at work, randomly sent him texts of the pictures and would leave them around the house. I have a feeling those pictures may have worked on a few of you ;) , but I wasn’t sure if they would work on him.

When I asked him what would help him feel ready to add baby #4, he talked about wanting things to calm down a bit. He started a new position just over a year ago at work and was just catching his groove for the hard and long work hours, the kids were starting school and I was starting a new freelance career. He had this ‘wish list’ of things that he would prefer to have set in order to go forward. That helped me with understanding where he was at and what was keeping his baby fever away.

It wasn’t until a few months ago that I started to get a glimpse that he may be getting infected — I caught him swooning over baby shoes at the store. That was the first sign that I saw that he may be getting closer and more comfortable with the idea of baby #4. Life started to calm down — we both found a better groove — I found a good balance for the main factors of chaos in the house.

This past month we officially started ‘trying’ because he has been hardcore infected with the baby fever.

We have started the journey again to basal body temping for fertility, signs of ovulation, chore sex and the dreaded 2 week waits, am I pregnant confusion and holding on to hope that we won’t experience any more pain and grief.

This month was a bust as far as getting pregnant, but we’re hopeful it won’t take too long for us. Then the fun will begin with daily injections, morning sickness and watching our children getting excited and ready for the new baby — and the new chaos that will unfold.

Operation Infect Husband With Baby Fever = success! Now begins “Operation put baby in my uterus!”

Read more from  on Accustomed ChaosUnspoken Grief
Follow Devan on Facebook and Twitter for all updates!
Want more? Find me on Babble KidsBabble Pets!

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Photo credit: © Devan McGuinness

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About Devan McGuinness

devanmcguinness

Devan McGuinness

Devan McGuinness is the writer of the lifestyle blog Accustomed Chaos. After surviving 12 miscarriages, Devan founded Unspoken Grief, a resource and support site for perinatal and neonatal loss. Read bio and latest posts → Read Devan's latest posts →

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0 thoughts on “Operation ‘Give Husband Baby Fever’: An Overdue Update

  1. mrs.d says:

    Aww, congratulations Devan! Hopefully it’s not too long.

    We just started trying this month so I’m on my first ‘two week wait’ and may I say.. two weeks is a freaking long time! haha. But, Husband would like a girl first, so we’re kinda following the Shettles method so it might take us a little longer than it should to get pregnant. Though we’d be thrilled with either boy or girl. :)

    It took me a while to get Husband on board with the whole idea.. but the wait was good for us. There’s still a few things we’d rather have gotten accomplished before, but since we don’t know how long it’ll take us to get pregnant, we’ve decided to start trying.. Anyways, the world doesn’t stop when you have a kid and there’s always time to get stuff done, even if the process becomes a little more ‘interesting’. :)

  2. Amanda R. says:

    You’re not the only one with baby fever! I’ve been trying to infect my husband for like a year, but like yours he wanted things to “settle down” (whatever that means!) This is our first we’re trying for and apparently we are not the only ones in the family who have baby fever as well. We just told our parents we’re trying and my mom asked me when I went off BC–I told her Jan and she asked me “Well why aren’t you pregnant yet? I can’t wait much longer!”

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