Grief and Pregnancy – Dealing With Death While Creating Life

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dealing with death while creating new life
Dealing with death while creating new life.

It’s been a hard week. I’m really making an effort to “finish well” and complete these last few weeks of pregnancy without a hitch.

Then life kicks in and that friendly reminder of “YOU ARE NOT IN CONTROL” happens.

Between wrapping up work, juggling the kids, dealing with pregnancy issues – I get a message on Thursday that my Grandpa isn’t doing well and isn’t expected to make it.

Friday morning I awoke to learn that he had passed on Thursday night. Eerily the same time I had woken up from a nap.

WHAM. That’s life for you.

So, what to do?  Good question. Here is my attempt.

  • First: Process 1 of 5
    First:  Process
    I am processing. There is the absence of a relative, while we were not close the last several years - there are memories and unpacked emotions to deal with.
  • Second: Cry 2 of 5
    Second: Cry
    I took a few hours off yesterday to sleep, cry and to just be. It was wonderful. Needed. And I should do that more often.
  • Third: Do Something Fun 3 of 5
    Third: Do Something Fun
    Today, my daughter and I went for pedicures and shopping. A good foot massage and retail therapy can do wonders for the soul.
  • Fourth: Grieve 4 of 5
    Fourth: Grieve
    Grandpa's memorial is around 5 hours from here. We'll be heading out to attend and I am really wanting to embrace this time. Despite being 35 weeks pregnant and living in HOT AS HELL Texas - I need that time to grieve and understand what's happened.
  • Fifth: Relax 5 of 5
    Fifth: Relax
    I am a few days off of work to just be. Thankful that the company I work for offers bereavement pay. My vacation days have been saved for the baby, and the few days will allow me to dedicate time to relax. And I do believe that a prenatal massage is in order!

    Darling photo was found at: overwhelmedbyjoy.wordpress.com

While this is hard and another slice of life – I’m thankful for the time we had together. If life was only as easy as following these 5 items – all would be hunky dory. I know it’s not. But it’s a start. I’m giving it to God and asking for his help in making it as easy as possible.

I feel for those who have to deal with a dear loved one’s passing, especially while pregnant and an emotional mess as is.

How Do You Deal With Grief and Pregnancy?

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