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How an Emetophobe Handles Morning Sickness

Spoiler alert: not very well.

Another fact about me that I didn’t include in my introductory post is that I have a pretty severe case of emetophobia. For those who don’t speak Latin or some other language with cryptic pre and suffixes, that’s a fancy way of saying that I have a fear of vomiting. Now, I know what you’re thinking, no one likes to vomit, and I know that. But this is something much more significant.

Since I was about 12, I have had a paralyzing fear of throwing up. I missed a huge portion of 7th grade because I couldn’t leave my house for fear of getting sick. At several points in my life I have basically subsisted on rice and gatorade because I convinced myself that it would be the safest thing to prevent food poisoning or stomach upset. I have washed my hands until they were raw, used Clorox wipes on pretty much anything that could have contracted a germ.

And when I do get a stomach ache or feel nauseous, the world might as well be ending.

My palms sweat, I hyperventilate, I’ve gotten dangerously close to passing out just from the intensity of the fear. My greatest fear in life isn’t heights or spiders or anything like that, it’s throwing up.

So you can imagine that morning sickness has been bit of a challenge to say the very least. It started on a Monday morning out of the blue during my 6th week.  Up until that point besides tired, I had felt pretty good.  I was hoping I was going to be one of those lucky ones who never feels sick.  Uh, no.  I had to lay down at least 3 times that morning while trying to get ready that morning and I didn’t eat anything until around noon. It was absolutely awful. And it was only just the start.

Since that day it has been a daily struggle with the nausea. I have learned that, though it goes against absolutely everything that I believe, eating is the key. The later I wait to eat, the worse the nausea gets.  If I sleep in on the weekends, I feel more nauseous because I missed the key eating window. If I let myself get hungry, it’s already too late. I haven’t yet figured out how to manage the evening nausea because it does not respond to food, nor reason, nor panic.

Yesterday was the first day where I wasn’t sure I could handle it. I have a prescription for Zofran and I have been using it liberally, but yesterday the Zofran didn’t touch the nausea. I had to leave for work at 7:30 and at 7 I was still in bed, deep breathing and willing myself to not throw up. I made it to work but the whole morning it was a struggle. And even when the nausea started to let up a little bit in the afternoon, the fear that it would come back had all but thrown me back into the cycle of nausea.

When I talked to my obgyn about it last week she told me that the morning sickness might let up as soon as the 10th week when the placenta is fully formed, but it seems like that hasn’t been the case with anyone else I’ve talked to. And the more people I talk to, the more tell me that theirs didn’t let up until the middle of the second trimester, or, even more panic inducing, the day they delivered.

I have read as many articles as I can stand, I’ve got my Zofran and a huge stash of starches and sour candies in my purse at all times, but I feel like somehow I must be missing the great morning sickness cure.

So I’m turning to the masses- what was your go to morning sickness cure? And at what point did this awful stage finally pass?

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