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I Had a Good Feeling: Taking an Early Pregnancy Test

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Today, I am 11 days past ovulation.

Just 11 days.

This was the first cycle that I’ve ovulated in months.

I tried to stay calm, but I had a really good feeling.

I let my enthusiasm get the best of me and I convinced my husband that we should take a pregnancy test.

Tonight.

I chose a test that says it can detect pregnancy 6 days before a missed period.

I’m due for my period on Friday, so I have only 3 days left to wait.

I asked my husband what he thought and he was still reluctantly nodding “yes” as I was running for the bathroom before he could change his mind. (We always read our results together.)

Negative.

I must like to torture myself.

I must.

Because now, it’s nearly 10pm and my heart is hurting.

And I can’t undo taking the test.

If I hadn’t tested, I’d still have hope.

False hope, but hope nonetheless.

This shouldn’t be this difficult.

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