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Ladies And Gentleman, Kate Winslet’s (Real) Breasts

An image of nude Kate Winslet from the film “The Reader.” (see full image below) was circulating a few years back. Someone just sent it to me and it got me thinking.

My first reaction is I LOVE KATE WINSLET. This is a real mother, who has given birth to, and breastfed, a couple of babies and she’s showing her real boobs on the big screen. We don’t see nearly enough of this. I’m not sure I can think of any other actress who’s been such a champion in this department as Kate Winslet. In the ’90s she had the real curves, in the ’00s she had the real sag. She’s got a real face. And a real ass. And she’s always been really gorgeous. And totally brilliant. And incredibly sexy. I have noticed that, in more households than just my own, she is the object of much husband lust.We should all celebrate Kate, like Oprah does in the clip below.

Having said that, it’s an awful picture. Look at it.

The photo doesn’t capture the sexiness of the scene in the actual movie AT ALL. In the film she undresses to get into a bath while a much younger, very handsome man watches her. He becomes completely enraptured by her confidence and earthiness. But this image doesn’t convey that feeling in the slightest. It’s a peeping tom screen snatch. Her face is looks (appropriately, given the way we’re all looking at her now) guarded and dour. The photo looks hastily taken, blurry and perv-y. It’s the snapshot equivalent of Manet’s Olympia- the infamous painting of a whore looking back at the viewer with no small amount of guardedness and contempt.

It reminds me of those tabloid magazine covers of unsuspecting celebs with NO MAKEUP!  It seems our celebrities are either air-brushed or CAUGHT ON TAPE! Neither tells the whole story, of course. Nor does much service to the idea of what really makes a woman beautiful.

Nevertheless, the larger point remains. The fact that Kate is not afraid of her post-baby body is wonderful.  The fact that she doesn’t insist on all kinds of trick angles to disguise the fact that boobs wobble, droop and slide into the armpits when she’s horizontal, is a good reminder to all of us that this is what boobs are like and this is what boobs do. We have few role models when it comes to keeping it real, so thank you Kate. And thank you Diane Keaton for never getting plastic surgery (or so much as one shot of the ‘tox). You guys are real, and really gorgeous.

As promised, here’s Kate getting major props from Oprah who says the word “breasts” over and over again in a kind of trance-inducing way.

And thank you to Mia Freedman for alerting me to this topic and this clip.

Image: PR Photos

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