Holly Finn is on a mission, a baby making mission. And it’s not going too great. She is struggling with infertility and has tried numerous rounds of unsuccessful IVF. Holly is sharing her journey in a new book called The Baby Chase which is excerpted in this article from the Wall Street Journal.
I of course was attracted to the article to hear another women talk openly about infertility but while reading it I was reminded that no two persons struggle is the same. Holly is a women in her forties without a husband. In her book and interviews she focuses on the cause of her infertility, the age of her eggs and how that affects “65% of the female infertility ” that her doctor sees. So while we’re both infertile, we’re pretty much opposites.
I was struck by this fact when later on in the article I read Holly refer to the scenario of having babies when you’re in your twenties, “you’ll probably have as many children as you’d like, and they’ll be healthy.” She goes on later to say, “The first thing I’d like to tell women ages 26 to 34 is: Start having babies. I know it’s not polite or funny. But I don’t want others to go through what I’m going through now.” While I know she was simply generalizing, I want to bust this myth. Just because you’re at the peak fertile age, that doesn’t mean you’ll easily get pregnant.
I’m 26. We started trying when I was 24. My husband just turned 29. Supposedly we’re at the age where we should be reproducing like rabbits. But as you know, that is not the case. We are by far the youngest couple at our fertility clinic. While Holly does a good job at approaching the issue of female infertility past a certain age, please remember that it can happen to anyone no matter their age. And while you can say that it’s easier for us because we have more time and the chances of fertility treatments working for us are higher, please remember that it’s still difficult. No matter what your story is. You never want to be told that having children won’t come easy.