Pregnancy and Facebook: What's Your Status?Rebekah Kuschmider
In the social media age, it’s oh-so-common to announce a pregnancy on Facebook. And why not? It’s so easy and gets the word out fast to a lot of people. It’s not a good way to tell, say, your mom, but for all those college buddies and former coworkers, it does the trick. When I got past the crucial 12-week mark and knew it looked like smooth sailing ahead, I posted a shot of a sonogram as a way to share my big news.
But that’s pretty much where my pregnancy related Facebooking ends.
Two years ago, when second-baby-fever hit me hard, my husband and I could not consider a second child for a number of personal reasons. That was also the time when many friends started announcing second pregnancies. Each announcement was like a kick in the solar plexus for me, though I did my best to remember to be happy for my happy friends. But I couldn’t deny the sting when I read status updates and tweets from women chatting on about symptoms and names and nursery decor. It was their right to share their thoughts and questions about pregnancy on social media but, to me, it was a wistful reminder of the baby I wasn’t having.
Right now, I know I have friends, women I care about, who are struggling with fertility issues. There are others who are not in a place financially or in their relationships to pursue pregnancy. And while I know they are happy on my behalf, I also know they won’t enjoy reading updates about my every doctor appointment and food craving.
Let’s put it this way: if I won the lottery, would I update Facebook every time I paid off my mortgage or bought a pair of $1000 Louboutains? Or would I keep a low profile because most of my friends probably DIDN’T just win the lottery and are working 9-5 to pay the bills?
That’s how I feel about pregnancy and social media. I’m not going to hide my good fortune but I’m also not going to dwell on it or load up tickers that autopost the size of my fetus by comparing it to fruit. (Related: I’ve been trying to figure out a better system for describing fetal size than fruit and I’m coming up blank. Anyone? Ideas?) I have a complete life and can address any number of topics online. That was true before pregnancy and it remains true now. For the sake of my friends who might prefer to hear about my opinions on the latest episode of Up All Night rather than the status of my roids – which, if we’re being honest, is everybody I know – I try to remember to keep the prego-talk to a minimum.
How do you feel about talking pregnancy on social media? Keep it to a minimum or chat it up?
Photo credit: photo stock