2. The hair.
3. The cleavage.
4. The ultrasounds.
5. The glow.
6. The attention.
7. Early boarding.
8. Those special parking spaces at Babies R Us.
9. Someone cares enough to closely examine your urine on a regular basis.
10. You are always doing something, even when you’re not doing anything at all
11. You’re now a part of the cycle of life.
12. And yet, it really is all about you.
13. You get to sit down on the subway.
14. And if no one gives you a seat, you get to be totally indignant about it.
15. Prenatal yoga is actually easy.
16. You have to have that falafel right now, even though it’s 18 miles away.
17. And someone is going to get it for you.
18. If you didn’t before, you suddenly feel passionate about things like the environment. Why should my fetus be exposed to 200 known chemicals? You feel good about your new cause. You start a blog.
19. 40 weeks of genuinely recreational sex.
20. Plus, those crazy sex dreams. Who knew?
21. No lines for the bathroom.
22. No more sucking in the stomach.
23. No more tampons.
24. No more PMS.
25. Nothing else really matters.
26. Your body is amazing. Seriously, look at what you’re doing.
27. Caffeine in pregnancy is not as bad as most people think.
28. Nesting means you actually want to organize all your crap
29. Ina May Gaskin.
30. Being in the water feels so good, you might cry.
31. Prenatal massage is covered by some insurance carriers.
32. Some jerk at work is rattling on and you feel the baby kick, Wtvr dude.
33. Tiny, tiny socks.
34. Those women on the pregnancy reality shows are definitely way worse off than you.
35. Soon you get to go on vacation. I mean maternity leave. I mean, well. OK, you get one unpaid month. But at least your boss won’t expect to you work during actual labor.
36. You’re never alone.
37. Baby names.
38. The tax break.
39. Getting caught up in a movie and then when the credits roll, remembering, Oh yeah, I’m pregnant.
40. Did I mention that nothing else matters?
41. The heartbeat blasting into the room via the doppler
42. Roundness and swell are not considered flaws.
43. At any given moment you can read about what you are feeling and thinking and doing (thank you personalized pregnancy calendar industry).
44. Your childbirth educator assigns foot massages as home work.
45. Someone else is doing the kitty litter.
46. The mantle of motherhood. Bring it.
47. Stretch waistbands.
48. Think of all the money you’re saving not plowing through a sixer every night!
49. Holy cats, that falafel was totally worth it.
50. You’re a life-giving goddess.