The Moment You Should Push Delete Instead of Send


stephanie nielson I’m sure you’re all familiar with The Nie Nie Dialogues, the inspiring personal blog of mother and plane crash survivor Stephanie Nielson. I mean she was on Oprah, how much bigger can you get? Stephanie recently announced her miraculous pregnancy (she still has burns that cover 80% of her body) and since has been posting about her rocky first trimester. Well, one reader got a little too tired of what she perceived as constant complaints from Stephanie and confronted her by sending her a not so nice email which said this:

While I am very happy for you that you are having another little one, I really wish you’d stop complaining about it so much. I know people who would love to be sick throwing up because they are pregnant but they aren’t because they CAN’T get pregnant. Just be glad that you can even have another baby (especially after everything you’ve been through) and stop complaining about it! You have been through some very challenging times in your life and I’m not downplaying that, but I feel like a lot of your blog is dedicated to complaining and it’s not very fun to read.

Stephanie published this because she was more than a little ticked and I can see why but I can also see why the writer sent it. She obviously has personally dealt with infertility or has close friends or family members that are infertile. She is obviously sensitive to the issue. She obviously wasn’t having her best day.

I’ve been there. I’ve cried after hearing yet another person is pregnant. I’ve wanted to pull my hair out after hearing complaint after complaint from pregnant women. I’ve been a grump after hearing about another unwed celebrity pregnancy. I’ve been irrational. I’ve been heartbroken time and time again.

And this is what I’ve learned: when you find that something is making you feel worse, step away. Unsubscribe to those blogs of newly pregnant women that are getting on your nerves. Hide the consistent updates of expecting friends on Facebook. Stop looking at religiously. Say no to the next baby shower invitation. Don’t feel bad about it. Take care of you.

And don’t forget the next time you find yourself with an angry email draft in your inbox, push delete instead of send.

image: Nie Nie Dialogues