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The Pregnant Woman Spectacle

claire_35 weeksI’m approaching 37 weeks pregnant and I’m not going to beat around the bush: I’m huge. Huge-mongus. Ginormous. I’m a petite woman when I’m not pregnant and this baby boy is currently packing on the OZs at a rapid rate. This photo is from 8 days ago and trust me, I’m even bigger now.

The result is that people are staring at me. I mean, really staring at me in public. Of course, most pregnant women get some attention in their third trimester because people feel you are pregnant enough that they can safely comment on your condition. In my normal day-to-day life I’m surrounded by other stay-at-home moms who shower me with compliments and empathetic comments, having been there themselves.

But the looks I’ve been getting the past week out in public are of an entirely different nature. They are these long, sideways glances at my stomach. People at the supermarket quickly glance up at my face and then nervously back down to my belly and look properly astounded. I feel like I’m something off the Nat Geo channel.

Today is my wedding anniversary so last night my husband and I went out to a very upscale French restaurant for dinner—a real treat for us. (Our fist date was at Arby’s, so that probably gives you a hint as to how excited I was about our fancy date.) I dusted off my one maternity dress, blew out my hair, did my make up and was feeling pretty darn good about myself. When we got to the restaurant the hostess led us to our table and as we walked I could feel people just STARING at me uncomfortably. I honestly think they were worried I might pop a squat right there and push the baby out on the floor of the restaurant.

Each time I got up to go pee during dinner (three times in 90 minutes, of course) I felt eyes boring into my midsection. It took all my self-control not to let the pregnant lady hormones loose and yell, “What is wrong with all you people?! Haven’t you ever seen a woman 9 months pregnant waddle to the ladies room before?!?!”

Is there something about being this pregnant that makes people uncomfortable??

Read more of Claire’s writing at Rants from MommylandAnd for even more silliness follow her on FacebookTwitter, and Pinterest.

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