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The Third Trimester Bladder Blues

Toilet

Say hello to my current BFF

Apparently my bladder has not received the memo that the celebration isn’t to begin until the baby is actually born next month. My bladder is partying now as if there’s a blue light special on Charmin and Cottonelle. How else to explain the twice an hour that it commands me to pee?

That’s twice an hour, 24-hours a day. Waking hours. Sleeping hours. My baby is breach, which means she’s literally sitting on and/or kicking my bladder. And that explains why it feels as if my bladder a literal punching bag. With each hit I am reminded why I never took up professional boxing.

Isn’t the third trimester fun?

It’s ironic how much my body seems to want to sleep now in preparation for the lack of sleep I will be experiencing for the next 18 years starting in about 5 weeks. And yet I’m awake every 30-60 minutes after I get into bed because I have to pee, which means I am refreshed not at all come morning.

Add to that a nearly 3-year-old who is at the height (please, God, let this be the height) of her not-sharing, temper tantrum phase, and some hot days (not as hot as the heat wave across the country, but hot enough for a 34-week pregnant lady) and I’m trying to keep remembering why it was I wanted to have a second baby (not to mention the first one).

Why is it that once my bladder finds some relief from a literal bouncing baby girl and I’ll be able to sleep that I won’t be able to sleep because the same bouncing baby girl will be affecting me in every other way?

There will be light at the end of the tunnel eventually, right? Please say yes, and then tell me what it is and when I can expect to see it.

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