Many of us around here are either pretty far along pregnant, or new moms (readers and bloggers alike). Being in your 20s or 30s, that’s pretty common! I bet many of you also have friends who are expecting or have recently had babies. In my group of friends, there were 3 in March, 5 in April, 3 in May, 2 in July, 1 in August, and various others due after that point. I think there will be close to 20 new babies this year!
Being a new mom — whether it’s your first time or your 10th — is hard. You’re exhausted and recovering, you have a new person to get to know, the house to care for, possibly other kids to care for…. It’s a lot! Which is why blessing new moms is so important. Read on for 10 ways you can bless a new or soon-to-be mom.
1. Lend her an ear
Every new mom (or very pregnant mom) has a lot of concerns and thoughts in her head: how will my birth go? Will I recover quickly? Will this baby be healthy, or will we struggle with colic or reflux? and so on. Even if you’ve just had a baby yourself (or are about to pop anyday), you can still call up a new mom and talk to her for a little while.
2. Take her kids
If she’s got older kids, chances are she’s not quite sure what to do with them in the very early weeks. They’ll continue needing regular meals, chances to get out of the house or see their friends, and so on; but she needs to rest, recover, and spend some one-on-one time with the new baby. Offer to take her kids for a few hours so she can take a nap with the baby. Don’t be afraid to do this in the last weeks of pregnancy, too, when she just needs a nap! That would probably be the biggest help for me!!
3. Bring her a meal
She’s not up to cooking now, so unless she has someone staying with her who is cooking for her, she may need some help in this area. Her family has to eat!! Call her and ask her when is best and if they have any specific food allergies or preferences, just in case. A lot of nursing moms want to avoid spicy foods, or tomatoes, or caffeine; dairy allergies are common too. Before baby comes, consider helping her cook some meals to fill her freezer.
4. Help clean her house
Especially if she’s got other relatively small children, her house might be an absolute disaster. The mess-making abilities haven’t changed, but her capability to do something about it temporarily has. Offer to do a load of laundry or dishes or even pick up the playroom a little. Also excellent in those last I-don’t-wanna-do-anything weeks!
5. Send her a card
Let her know immediately that you’re thinking of her and are happy her new baby has arrived. Write her a heartfelt note. This is good even if you’ve had a baby and can’t get over to visit right away. It means a lot when friends take the time to say “Congratulations on your new baby, I’m thinking about you,” even if that’s all they can do.
6. Play chaffeur
Do her kids need to get to activities? Does she need someone to take her to the pediatrician or follow-up OB visits? If there isn’t anyone around to take her, offer to do it. Even better, see point #2 and take her kids to playground if she’s at a doctor’s visit (after dropping her off)!
7. Bring her groceries
Going to the store anyway? Call her and ask if you can pick anything up for her. Maybe she’s just run out of milk, or needs more diapers for the baby. It’ll save her a trip and make her life so much easier!
8. Invite her for a mom’s night out (with baby)
After a few weeks she might be ready to “rejoin the world,” so to speak. Invite her to join you for some coffee or dinner (with the newborn, likely, but not older kids). Connect and re-discover what ‘normal life’ is all about, even through the haze of sleepless nights.
9. Help her create a scrapbook
This can be a long-term project, but perhaps just help her with the birth and “first photos” page to start. It’s a good time for her to write her memories and feelings down (while they’re fresh), but she might need some motivation from a friend. This is also a great end-of-pregnancy project: she can add the actual pictures later, but decorate the pages now.
10. Bring her baby a present
Every baby is special and deserves to be celebrated. Even if it’s her third, fifth, or sixteenth, bring a small present for her baby. A lot of moms who are having “subsequent” babies don’t get many, if any presents because people assume they “have what they need” and don’t bother. Moms feel special though when people bring even a small item for their new baby, because that is acknowledging that this baby isn’t just ‘another in the herd,’ but a truly unique and welcomed person.
How do you bless new moms?
Top image by edenpictures