“I’m sort of a hormone geek,” says sexologist Jaiya in “How Hormones Affect Your Libido After Pregnancy.” Jaiya is the co-founder, with Ellen Heed, of RSVP (Reclaim Sexual Vitality Postpartum) a service that helps women get back in touch with their sexuality after having kids.
The duo’s aim is to help new mothers understand what’s going on physically and hormonally, so they might better anticipate and address problems related to desire, the baby blues, and postpartum depression.
Jaiya and Ellen have a very casual– dare I say, sensual- style to their tutorials. [VIDEO after jump:]
In their video on hormones, they explain that right after a normal childbirth women are drenched in happy hormones: serotonin, oxytocin, dopamine. “It’s a moment of extreme expression when mother and baby are connected– but what goes up must come down.” There’s a crash. And new moms are beset by some less sexual hormones, or what the RSVP gals call, “the soup of low libido and desire.” The solution is to make it easier for the sexy hormones to flow. And they have very specific tips along those lines.
I highly recommend these videos.
Many couples find they are completely panicked about the state of their love lives in the postpartum period. It’s normal to fear that something very important has been lost forever. This is a time when mom is, as Heed points out, ”hormonally biased towards her baby.” The focus on her partner is temporarilily shut down. From an evolutionary point of view, it makes sense that she might not crave sex right this minute. But soon enough mom’s hormones will go back to the baby-making phase, and she’ll get that itch. In the meantime, Jaiya and Heed have lots of very sane and gimmick-free tips. They talk about specific issues such as vaginal dryness, soreness and pelvic floor problems. But they also get into cultural issues such as the myths of the non-sexual mother and the madonna/whore complex.
The whole series can be seen here.
Their free video training series– launched today, Monday, Feb 14th for Valentine’s Day– is here.
And here’s a good one for Valentine’s Day. It’s called Three Tips To Keep Sex Hot After Childbirth: