"Watch This Amazing Unassisted Birth"
I just saw this short video of a woman giving birth alone. It was posted on Youtube with the caption: “This mamma was waiting for her husband and midwife and just did it! It really can be that simple.”
I don’t want to say too much until you’ve seen the video because I’m very curious how people respond to this. It’s pretty intense.
Check it out:
Here’s what I thought watching it:
On the one hand, Wow. Incredible mom, incredible instincts. Yes! Birth can be terrifically simple. Astonishing to see given the typical representation of birth-as-a-screaming-emergency we see on TV and in movies, fictional or otherwise. Women and babies know a lot more than we’re given credit for.
On the other hand, this felt scary to me.
I felt for her. The sound of her breathing, the closed environment, the way she looks around afterwards and doesn’t even call out because it’s so clear she’s all alone.
One of the big selling points of the midwife is that she’s with you for more of the labor that a doctor might be. Midwife literally means “with woman.” I love the idea that there’s someone with you in labor, someone to reassure you and support you. And, not inconsequentially, someone with extensive and significant training and experience in birth.
This mom was waiting for her husband and midwife and they weren’t there. These things happen. People don’t make it the hospital. Babies can come fast (I’m guessing this was not her first but I don’t know).
This mom rose to the occasion and she seriously deserves a glass of champagne and permission to retell this incredible story over and over and over, working out whatever feelings it inspired.
But I do wonder, watching this, that the romanticizing of going-it-alone can lead us down a dangerous path away from the time honored tradition of women being supported in labor.
I see lots of posts in my Facebook feed with captions like, “watch this amazing unassisted birth.” (This is what happens when you’re a childbirth educator.) But we have evidence that even in prehistorical settings women had help in labor! This was not a planned unassisted birth, so I’m not even going to get into the risks and safety issues.
Having said all of that, I remember being inspired by stories of moms giving birth alone when I was pregnant for the first time. I really did. I didn’t want to give birth alone or in a cab or in a bathroom or barn, but it reassured me to know that this can happen and women figure out what to do. That was a really helpful, empowering message.
So I’ll put it out to you: Do we do good or do we do harm when we revere the “amazing unassisted birth”?
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Well, I don’t know that we should hold it up as an ideal, but it is inspiring to women who think “I can’t/it will be too hard/too painful/what if I’m alone/I need drugs/I need a c-section” or whatever other negative roadblocks they make for themselves. It should serve as a reminder that wow, the human body CAN do it, it doesn’t have to be a screaming, cinematic event, and if you DO have help, an epidural, whatever other aids YOU want then it should be even BETTER than this. But no, it shouldn’t be some kind of litmus test of how hardcore/devoted a mom you are
Ceridwen,
This is a complicated issue, I think. So many women are deciding to have unassisted births. That *is* worrisome. Instead of criticizing them, though, I think we have to look at why anyone would want to do that. I wonder if it is because our birth system in America has become so broken, so expensive, and so dangerous that women find themselves feeling that like an unassisted birth is their only choice. In countries where birthing women are respected and cared for, unassisted birth is much less common than in the United States.
As you already know, the United States has one of the highest maternal mortality rates in any country in the industrialized world. While other countries are making birth safer, our maternal and fetal mortality rates continue to climb. This is totally unacceptable.
Though ACOG works hard to give us the impression that home birth is unsafe, it’s not women having unassisted or home births who are dying. It’s women in the hospital. Which is very sad and totally unacceptable. Instead of worrying about glorifying unassisted birth, I think we need to have a national conversation about how to make our current hospital birth system safer and more responsive to a pregnant woman’s needs.
@Jennifer. I totally agree that women wouldn’t be opting out, if opting in was satisfactory– I’ve argued that in many of my blog posts on the topic of home birth. There was something about this video that just got me thinking… Maybe it’s partly that I had a friend who’s home birth was nearly unassisted and she was very shaken up by it. Maybe it’s that I spend so much time arguing for the importance of continuous support. I find that I’m frequently making the point to women of our generation that we’re not meant to mother in isolation. We should be given huge props for allowing ourselves to feel good about being supported– we are so often meant to “do it all” or “figure it out” and be independent, etc etc. I get the amazing work this woman in this video did and she deserves huge credit. Look, she did it alone! Amazing. But I also really like the sound of: Look, she did it was a ton of support! Amazing!
Am I the only one thinking how did she have the clarity to set up and turn on the video camera? If I was by myself going into labor, the camera would’ve been the furthest thing from my mind…
Autw– I was actually thinking that I should have commented on that, too. If it was a planned home birth she may have set it up earlier … I don’t know. You make a good point.
I was actually nervous watching that video. I understand that this was to be an unprepared delivery video but she didn’t try to suction out the baby’s nose or mouth or deliver the placenta. It was disturbing for me to watch
I agree with Katie and atuw. She looked in shock that the baby came out. And it confused me, scared me and just made me nervous how she just sat there putting water on the babies head and holding it wierdly. Id love to hear the whole story to this birth.
i’m with those who wondered about the camera, but any way you do it, she got the little one out and it seemed very effortless.
actually, she might have had it set up waiting for someone to come. she did look nervous and scared like she didn’t know what to do. i couldn’t do it at home no matter what. i was a schmuck and didn’t take labor classes because i thought it was so easy. it was NOT and I’ll be front and center whoo-whoo-haaing next time.
Hollie said it best. We need to empower women to trust their bodies, without alienating them from hospitals. I’m very pro-doctor, just anti-doctor bills. Where is the middle ground? For example, what about options for women like me? Currently pregnant with the third, knowing I will most likely give birth under an hour and around 36-37 weeks. Neither hospital nor midwife are good options for me. I don’t want to be ambulanced to the hospital which could turn into a very stressful chaotic situation. However, my second one came about 36wks 4 days, and midwives would not attend my planned home birth because I was too early and considered high risk. Which is bogus because I gave birth alone like this woman, peacefully and easily, luckily there were no problems with the baby. What I need is a midwife without restrictions or a doctor who makes house calls. I guess I wish there was more of a middle ground, too many (professionals) are on either side of the spectrum. Seriously considering a doula and then going to hospital after. Really just don’t know.
It is definitely not the ideal, but as you said already it is possible and as we’ve seen in this video and possibly other videos if you’ve ever seen “I didn’t know I was pregnant” or something like it it isn’t tremendously difficult to do. That being said there is always the what if scenarios that makes the hospital with doctor or midwife or other trained professional on hand a good thing as it is always better safe than sorry. I know due to religious beliefs and practices as well as the “I’m afraid of the hospital setting” that makes women more likely to want to do this and be home away from all the medical interference, but I particularly will advise my friends and I will most definitely when possible give birth in a hospital hopefully one that makes it look more like home but with medical equipment it just makes me feel more comfortable to know that IF something should go wrong they are they’re to help with the right equipment. This is just my take though and if you don’t take my advice to do it in a hospital like home situation or even a home like hospital where you still have the medical equipment needed and the team of medical professionals its completely up to you and of course the laws where you are here were not legally allowed to have unassisted or home births unless it is an emergency like this one.
Saw this on Tosh.0.
Sorry but this just doesn’t look right to me.
I agree that this upswing in unassisted births in the US is probably due to women not being able to access a good spectrum of choices within the medical system. I’ve had two midwife assisted home births, both fully paid for by the public healthcare system, and I can’t imagine opting for an unassisted birth were we to have a third child. It seems incredibly risky and given the incredibly high quality of midwifery care here (Ontario) I don’t know why anyone would do it!
My son was born on our bedroom floor. My husband was on the phone with a dispatcher who didn’t believe I was actually in labor. The medics arrived a few minutes too late. Everything was fine, and other than tearing, neither of would have even needed a doctor; both perfectly healthy. In those few minutes when it was just the three of us in the bedroom, it was bliss. I cannot explain the thrill of being able to enjoy your baby uninterrupted. No latex gloves, no cold hands, just us in our little bubble. It’s not for everyone, but I support those who do purposely have unassisted births. It’s a very beautiful experience– especially for those who have issues with medical professionals.
I’m truly astonished at some of the responses here. Birth is in no way inherently dangerous. Yes, you have the very rare mishaps(outside of medical care) that can happen, but, really, those are often a result of environmental influences or our own preconceived judgements and expectations. We are able to create and shape our own reality. Assuming that most women who opt to have unassisted births do so out of fear of what is available in the medical system is actually insulting. I can guarantee you that is not the case; it may be for some, but for most it is not. Birth is as much a natural process in life and for our womanly bodies as is love or sex or the same process from which the child was conceived. When we start to regard birth as any different, that is when it becomes dangerous and difficult for woman and child. Most women choose unassisted birth not out of fear or apprehension but because birth is something they regard as being just as sacred and personal and beautiful and natural as the act of which got them there in the first place, and they would like to keep it that way.
Oh, and I realize that this woman’s birth was not a planned unassisted birth and I support that decision, but I think the shock you may see is from the fact that she was not expecting an unassisted birth and she may have had those preconceived notions of just how she thought her birth would be.
“she didn’t try to suction out the baby’s nose or mouth or deliver the placenta.”
Suction out the baby’s nose or mouth? Wha? People have been giving birth for hundreds of thousands of years without the benefit of suction. If the baby is breathing fine on its own there is no need for suction. Obviously it’s good to have suction on hand in case there is a problem, but it’s certainly not a birth must-have.
‘Try’ to deliver the placenta? The placenta comes when it comes, just like the baby did. What was she supposed to do to ‘try’ to deliver it? Cord traction?
i think this video is a great way of showing how normal and natural birth can be, if it is allowed. and like pp said, the baby doesn’t need suctioning, and the placenta doesn’t need to be immediately ripped from the mother’s body! There are huge benefits to leaving it for over half an hour even! And even benefits to no suctioning- the baby works anything out of his lungs on his own, though a little fluid in his throat is normal, considering he is taking his very first breath after being a fish for 9 months. unfortunately, many of the comments reflect the misconceptions of labor that are prevalent in our society due to television and unfortunate medical intervention in unnecessary situations.
wow. I am amazed to actually see her belly deflate when the baby was born. I cannot remember that, but I do remember my belly looking flatter after my water broke. Good on her for having it alone and not freaking out. I don’t know if I’d be quite so calm and collected.
no matter how or where the baby is born the most beautiful tear jerking thing is his or her 1st cry!always gets me.
I had a horrible child birth at a hospital, they cut back my pain medication the dr was horrible at the bedside, i had such a horrible time i did not even want to hold my son afterwards, the child i could not wait to meet for 10 months!! so this video to me gives a new perspective on what a amazing childbirth could be, without medication which is basically what i had and had no chosen to have…i give this strong parents more credit then ever! I see nothing wrong with child birth inhome as long as you trust the midwife!
That is so awesome! Good job mama!!! I love the expressions on her face! she’s so shocked when it pops out! Awwhe, and then she’s washin it’s head off.. then she looks at the camera thinkin “great, now what???” lol. You get a towel and give that baby some boob! I seen it rootin! Very great job mama!!!!
I agree with Emily. Unassisted childbirth, uninterrupted, would be very blissful. I haven’t had the experience myself, but am considering it. There is actually a great book written by Laura Kaplan Shanley titled, “Unassisted Childbirth.” The author and her ex-husband chose unassisted childbirth as their birth option, and absolutely swear by it. She points out that once a person can get past the fear, giving birth on your own, with the ones you love around you (without a medical crew) can be a very special experience.
http://www.unassistedchildbirth.com/
who was filming this birth?
Watching this, I wished someone was there to help her get out of the tub. She looked as though she didn’t know what to do next. How do you hold the baby and stand up in a bathtub at the same time? She couldn’t set the baby down, so… The birth looked amazingly easy. Warm water tubs seem like a great idea to me!! ♥♥