I’ve noticed a little something while being pregnant. When the conversation ultimately veers towards pregnancy and having kids, people love to do two things. First, moms love to share their (or their friends) horror stories. Stories of 3 day long labors, emergency c-sections, weight gain, stretch marks, you name it. And they always like to end with something like, “My boobs will never be the same.” Secondly, people love to make remarks about how easy their life was before they had kids. “Travel while you can!” “Must be nice to sleep in.” I’m sure you’ve heard the same.
I think this is an initial reaction because crazy horror stories are more entertaining to account than a story of a pleasant pregnancy and carefree labor. Where’s the story in that?
While these stories are expected, I realized just how often I hear negative things about having a child when my brother-in-law said something sweet and wonderful and it took me by surprise. He told my husband and I,
“Having a child is better than you could ever imagine. You will love it and I’m so happy for you.”
These two simple sentences made my heart swell. It reconfirmed in my mind that it will be worth it. And it’s the one thing that I most remember from what people have told us.
So while the horror stories are what might first come to mind and they’re entertaining now and again, remember the next time you’re talking to an expectant couple to throw some positive their way too. They need to hear it.
image: Catherine Giroux