I’m that girl who doesn’t like to take medicine. I practically have to be keeled over in pain to take an Advil for cramps or a headache. And I will only use antibiotics when they are absolutely necessary, which you might be surprised to find out, are very often not necessary for any of us to take. So you can imagine my shock when my first month of IVF medication and hormones arrived in the mail. There were four boxes with Styrofoam coolers in them, which were further packed with three different types of medications, and three additional packages with pills, needles, alcohol swabs, and a bio-hazard trash receptacle.
All for me. The girl who doesn’t take aspirin.
Sometimes, it’s hard to wrap my brain around the science involved in having this baby. And before anyone decides to use that as an invite to tell me anything along the lines of, “Well, your doubt and questioning just show that people shouldn’t have babies this way” (which is actually pretty darn close to what someone once said after trying to manipulate my feelings into meaning some bullhonky like that), I’d like to note that it’s difficult to wrap my brain around the science of having this baby because it’s difficult for me to wrap my brain around science.
I graduated high school with a five-year history/English sequence and didn’t take any math or science courses after tenth grade because I really did not like them at all. It wasn’t until I went to college that I had to suffer through their torture again. By this time, though, I was that much more lost in the subjects and only learned to detest them even more. Maybe if I had stuck it out with these subjects, I wouldn’t be so intimidated by all the science behind creating our little bambino.
It also doesn’t help that I don’t yet know what any of this medication is exactly for. I mean, I know it’s for my IVF process. But I won’t find out until my appointment tomorrow what each drug does, how I’ll use it, and what it might make me feel like. The plan was to have all the goods we needed to begin the process, and then go step by step with the doctors and nurses as to the whats and whys and hows of these medications.
There’s the Menopur, Crinone, Gonal, Cetrotide, Pregnyl, Dexamethasone, and Estradiol (most of which is featured in the picture above). Our fertility center will go over all of these drugs with us tomorrow, and I’ve been really good at not Googling each one. I’m sure if I do, I’ll find some horror story that happens to only 1 in like 90,000 bagillion people that will end up being all I can focus on. I don’t want that energy in my life. My wife always teaches me to stay positive, about everything. So I’ve been taking her lead on this journey. I’ll wait until tomorrow and let the professionals school me on these drugs.
But I can say, I’m very eager to find out what the Estradiol pills are for since I’m supposed to “take one a day vaginally at bedtime.” Eeek.
Read more of Aela’s writing at Two Moms Make A Right