Who Belongs In The Delivery Room?Monica Bielanko
I didn’t want anyone but my husband (and the doctors and nurses, obviously) in the delivery room.
Not only did I not want a crowd of folks staring at (and cheering for) my ever-widening vagina, but I just wanted it to be a special moment between me and Serge.
And the janitor.
At one very crucial pushing moment the janitor came into the room to empty the trash. My Lady Business was facing the door so it was pretty much the first thing she saw when she strolled into the room.
By that point, though, about five different nurses had been elbows deep at some point so I just didn’t give a damn. I waved at the janitor and welcomed her to the party then told my mom that she may as well stay for the whole thing, too.
The second time around it was just me and Serge welcoming Henry into the world and as much as I love my mom, I really enjoyed the intimacy of the moment. I’ve seen some births where aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents are all jammed into the delivery room wielding video recorders and cameras and take-out food and, while I can respect a woman’s decision, that’s just not how I roll. More is not merrier for this mama. It’s just too much. I know my mother-in-law would probably love to be present for the birth of a grandchild, but I cannot fathom her watching me crap on the table while I heave and ho and try to push out said grandchild.
Back in the day it was mama, the doctor, a nurse and that was it. Dad was exiled to the waiting room with his box of cigars, which is just absurd – he’s the one who started it all. But from allowing dad into the inner sanctum to the entire extended family? Increasingly, it seems like everyone from cousin Annie to Great Aunt Harriet are all up in the mix, camped out in the delivery room cheering on the new arrival. Is that even legal? Didn’t there used to be laws about how many people could be in the delivery room?
So, what about you? Who are you planning to have in the delivery room? Have you been coerced by your spouse into having some people there that you’d rather wait outside the room? Did someone ask to be there that you aren’t comfortable with? Did you tell them no? Or are you someone who likes to give birth to a crowd? Why? Do you ever feel embarrassed or is your family just close like that?
Babble Asks: To see or not to see? Dads at Delivery!