Your Breast Pump Offends Me: When Coworkers Can’t Deal
I don’t get it… What’s so offensive about this?
I was scouring the web for the latest parenting news when I stumbled across an article called Should Breast Pump Parts Be Hidden in the Workplace?
Wha?
I can understand coworkers being a little squeamish about spotting a coworker’s errant boob while she’s pumping, but just glimpsing a breast pump is now offensive?
Apparently so.
A recent reader of the New York Times Motherlode Blog sought advice for dealing with a co-worker who was “uncomfortable” seeing her breast pump parts peeking out of her unzipped bag. Commenters noted that they too had negative experiences with colleagues who didn’t like to see them washing their pump parts in communal sinks, or seeing their pumped milk in the shared refrigerators:
I washed pump parts in the shared sink and stored milk in the shared fridge/freezer. I always put the milk in an opaque plastic bag or freezer bag. The ONE day I forgot the bag and put the helpfully labeled “my mommy’s milk” baggies directly in the fridge an anonymous note appeared on the fridge door declaring that “bodily fluids should not be stored in public places”, which struck me as more than a bit silly given that it was a sealed bag and there is no shortage of genuinely gross rotting leftovers in the back of the fridge. I responded with a typed signed note saying that anyone who had concerns or questions should come air them to me in person in my office #, but of course no one did.
I completely support your right to do this. However, I also sympathize to some extent with people who don’t want to be reminded of bodily functions while in the workplace. I wonder if it would help to take the whole breastfeeding-rights issue out of it, and consider how this would be treated if it were an insulin pump and/or syringe and needles, or a person’s catheters. My own feeling is that the workplace needs to accommodate people’s personal bodily needs as much as possible. In return, people should be willing to go to some effort to make it possible for colleagues to avoid consciousness of those bodily needs.
If we do, as a previous commenter suggested, take breastfeeding rights out of this I think it becomes even more unbelievable! The person suggested we think of this as someone who doesn’t want to be reminded of body functions and gave the example of an insulin pump or a catheter. I cannot imagine a situation where someone would ever have the guts to ask a diabetic to please refrain from testing blood glucose or to please do it but don’t allow anyone in the office to know that he/she is a diabetic or to see any of the equipment.
If people are so sensitive that any thought of any sort of bodily function offends them they may want to consider working at home. If someone wants to make a HR complaint, I think that says quite a bit about them. Perhaps you could make one in return for harassment.
My thoughts? Some of the crap people wear at work is infinitely more offensive than a breast pump. And don’t get me started on the way some people shower in cologne and perfume or constantly apply horribly scented lotions? But hey. That’s just me. What do you think? Should Breast Pump Parts Be Hidden in the Workplace? Should a pumping mom be discreet about the entire process? Or should she do whatever she needs to do to be comfortable while pumping at work?
Maybe they’ve seen too many crappy horror movies, and think the breast pump/insulin pump/catheters are going to come alive, posessed by an evil force, and latch onto their breast/stab their side/jump into their urethra. It sort of sounds like Final Destination, right? So maybe that’s it. The people who are skeeved out by breast pump parts sitting casually poking out of a bag must have survived a horrible accident, and are now expecting to be murdered by Death with a very unlikely object, like a breast pump. Hey, makes as much sense as any other explanation…
I think it depends on a person’s situation in life. My boss is an older man who has never been married or had kids, and any suggestion of nursing or pumping seriously creeps him out. Discussing with him about finding a room for me to pump in was the most awkward conversation I’ve ever had. My coworkers all have kids, so they don’t care. I come back holding bags of milk, and they’ve never batted an eyelash. “Nothing to see here…”
HOWEVER, two of them are annoyed that I get two breaks each day. I’m pretty sure they think I’m doing this just because I want the breaks and that is has nothing to do with feeding my son. Sure, because I just love milking myself like a cow three times a day. I *totally* do it just to get out of working for fifteen minutes!
Grace–I agree with you…except my boss actually has kids and still acted like a 12 year old. there was no place provided to pump (“use the bathroom”), rolled eyes and sighs if I had to cut a conversation short to go pump. Co-workers being annoyed that I had “extra” breaks. Finding the time and a place to pump was a royal pain in the a$$ and I am positive that the negativity contributed to my decision to quit pumping after 7 months. This time around, I have the Healthcare Reform Bill on my side—they *have* to not only provide a place for me to pump that isn’t a restroom (and has locks!), they also have to give me time to do it. Hallelujah! Not a peep this time around.
To be helpful, I printed this section out for them whenever we discussed my maternity leave and coming back after baby.
from the U.S. Department of Labor
http://www.dol.gov/whd/regs/compliance/whdfs73.pdf
oh! and I didn’t even get to the part about being discreet–
I used to just keep my milk in the door of the work Fridge, but one day one of my coworkers actually used some as creamer in their coffee. No lie. So, now I put it in a little insulated lunch bag, not to save their delicate little eyes, but to keep Sticky McStealsMyStuff from pilching it even mistakenly.
@LBH, first, someone used your milk as coffee creamer!?! Ahahaha did they realize what they’d done? Oh my. Second, thanks for providing that link!
I’m not sure where I will be pumping when I return to work after giving birth. I have discussed it with some other women co-workers for ideas and there are (luckily) a few to choose from. I bet there will be some jealousy/anger/annoyance from a few co-workers about me needing to take a break once or twice to pump, but they’ll just have to deal with it. Honestly, the entire concept of pumping at work still makes me really uncomfortable but I’m hoping that once the baby is born and I get used to nursing and pumping, I won’t care as much or be embarassed.
LBH: Why do people steal other people’s food?!? That is so messed up! I don’t get it. I hope the person figured out what they had done and gagged.
And I actually gave one of my disgruntled coworkers a loud speech about federal laws regarding pumping in the workplace. I ended it with, “And I can’t help that I have to climb three flights of stairs to get to that room. It takes as long as it needs to.” An hour later she apologized for being rude.