Attending a wedding when single is an interesting experience. There are the sad stares because I’m without a plus one. There’s the elderly man who asks me to dance because all other guests have dates and he still wants to get down at 86. Let’s not forget being bombarded with the million dollar question – so, when are you getting married?
I am going to a wedding in Las Vegas in a few weeks. Therefore, I am bracing myself. Mostly because I don’t want to flip out and yell at the mother of the bride when she asks how such a beautiful woman is still single. Or when the priest splashes me with holy water (I am not cursed!). That’s why I’ve decided to create a guide so I am a good single gal at my friend’s wedding.
Here are ten embarrassing things to stop doing at a wedding when single.
What Not to Do at a Wedding 1 of 11
Weddings can be just as stressful for single women as for the bride-to-be. So let's not do any of the following things. Check out the slideshow!
Don’t Take Over the Bar 2 of 11
When there is a bar at a wedding (and not a cash bar), it brings joy to the single gal. Booze helps numb the annoyance that creeps up when that 86-year-old asks you to dance. But, please drink in moderation. If not, you'll end up sick. Or worse: making out with an 86-year-old. Photo Credit: Sujeiry Gonzalez.
No Bouquet Tackling 3 of 11
The bouquet toss is like an Olympic sport at weddings. Women line up and get in position. Some women line up and pretend not to care (that would be me, rolling my eyes at just the thought of catching the bouquet). But when the bride turns around and throws that bed of roses over her head, well, unmarried women go wild. Please refrain from tackling and screaming like hyenas during the bouquet toss. And do not snatch it away from someone else. This isn't daycare. Photo Credit: Flickr/johnmichaelmayer.
No Dirty Dancing 4 of 11
I had the time of my life...dirty dancing at an Indian wedding. But I was so embarrassed later when photo evidence was presented. So, watch yourself. Back that thing up with class and make sure that photogs are nowhere to be seen when you twerk like Miley. Or how about you just don't twerk at all. Photo Credit: Flickr/digitizedchaos.
Don’t Eat Your Feelings 5 of 11
Some single women turn to food when sad and lonely. And when there's an all-you-can-eat buffet at a wedding? Well, you want all you can eat. You will feel better, however, if you eat in moderation. Your dress will still fit and you won't feel guilty for eating your feelings. Plus, you'll be so stuffed you'll have trouble dancing. And then that 86-year-old will return to nurse you back to health. Photo Credit: Flickr/letouj.
Forever Hold Your Peace 6 of 11
When it's time for speeches, how about you sit down and let the bridal party take over. A sad single gal will make the speech all about her and her dating woes. You don't want to hear about the time I made out with a guy in an alley. Or how that bartender never called me back. Why don't they ever call back?! And that's why I will not be speaking at my friend's wedding. Photo Credit: Flickr/30691679@N07.
No Drunk Texting 7 of 11
You know that ex of yours that was supposed to be your date at this here wedding? You're texting or calling him drunk because you took over the free bar. No matter how sad you feel, don't call your ex or a sex buddy while at a wedding. He won't only freak out (a wedding reminded you of me?!) but you may also have to face him when you return from the festivities. Photo Credit: Flickr/paulaguinto.
No Woe-Is-Me Tears 8 of 11
I've cried at weddings because they are beautiful. It is lovely to see two people love each other so much that they commit till death do they part. But, stop the waterworks if it's about you and your single status. No one wants to hear about how your ex broke your heart and how you are ready for love. And why isn't it me, me, me?!! It's not your day, silly. Focus on the bride and groom and cry in your hotel room later. Photo Credit: Flickr/sdobie.
Beware of One Night Stands 9 of 11
The movie Wedding Crashers is not just a movie! Men do go to weddings and have s-e-x in mind. So, before you make a mistake and jump into bed with any old Joe Schmoe, ask yourself: am I ready to bed him for fun or because I am single and alone at a wedding? Photo Credit: IMDB.
No Skimpy Outfits 10 of 11
I have been guilty of wearing a hot tamale outfit that's better suited for a club than a wedding. And inching up my skirt while I back it up on the dance floor. It's fun, but not very lady-like. So, make sure your clothes are appropriate. Eyes should be on the bride, not your middriff. Photo Credit: Flickr/strolicfurlan.
Don’t Flirt with Waitstaff 11 of 11
Bartenders kind of have a thing for me, or maybe I have a thing for bartenders? Regardless, I will stay away from them at my friend's wedding. I am not there to mingle with waitstaff. I am there to celebrate my friends union. Again, it's not about us, single ladies. If you must, give him your number and keep the flirting to a minimum. At least until you get home. Photo Credit: Flickr/enikodemus.
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