It’s been a LONG time since I have been single since I paired up and have stayed that way for nearly 15 years now. I have a lot of friends who are also married or in serious relationships and also a lot of friends who are still or again single. It’s a fun mix because I get to hear stories and learn from both sides.
Since I have been in a couple for like almost half of my life, it’s hard for me to understand the life of a single person. What it would be like not to have someone to come home to, not to have assumed weekend plans, and a routine that included another set of hands. I can admit that I sometimes feel a little jealous of what I assume their lifestyle to be like and sometimes I wonder if they feel the same about mine. I can recognize that’s my own ideals being projected though and realize not everyone would be happy in someone else’s situation.
I know that not living the same type of life as someone else can give us some preconceived notions and misconceptions about what their life is like and the smart people at The Frisky pulled together some common misconceptions that singles have about couples and I’ve outlined a few of theirs and a few misconceptions I’ve noticed on my own:
Their life is exciting and crazy: They have more nights out with other friends and don’t have to check in with someone else to make sure plans don’t conflict with someone else, but that’s not the case for every single person. I sometimes wonder what the life of a single person would be life, but to me it all just sounds exhausting — coming from a very coupled person.
They have lots of one-night-stands: Well, not everyone is into that kind of relationship and the idea that they’re either in one-night-stand’s or experiencing a dry spell when it comes to that is not always the case. It’s weird to think that just because someone is not in a long-term committed relationship that they’ve somehow got different ideals when it comes to sex. I don’t think there’s anything wrong either way, but it’s a wrong thing to assume.
They’re available to help you at anytime: If you’re looking for a babysitter, you can’t just assume your single friend will be available. They’ve likely got a big, full life too. I have a tendency to think this way when it comes to some single people in my life who I rely on for some help with the kids and it’s not really fair to them.
They are always looking for the right person: Not everyone who is single is actually looking for or wanting to be with a pairing and that’s okay. There are some people who are totally happy with going with the flow, waiting for things to naturally happy, and/or going on a few days and prefer to keep things more casual and light. I know a single friend like that and he seems totally happy with it that’s okay.
They’re jealous of our relationship: It’s really presumptuous to assume that every single person is striving to have what couples have — and I know I wondered that when I was very young and new into my relationship (talking almost 15 years ago). I had wondered why my then-friends were not looking harder at finding the right person for them and why they didn’t seem as enthused about my relationship — which at the time, I read as jealousy. Truth seems to be that no one really cares and they just don’t want you to rub their faces in it.
::What are some of the misconceptions you’ve come across? Share in the comments! ::
More on Babble:
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- 20 Ways to Improve Your Relationship Now
- 10 Things Not to Say to Someone After a Breakup
- 25 Readers Share The First Thing They Bought For Baby While Pregnant
- 15 Small Details Women Wish Their Partner Would Remember
Devan is a freelance writer living in Toronto, Ontario with her husband, three kids and expecting baby #4 at the end of this year. Read more from Devan on Babble and “like” Accustomed Chaos on Facebook!