Women are said to be great liars. But men, well, they may just be the weirdest liars. How weird? I scoured the Internet to find out and have my own experience to share.
Let’s start with my odd but true tale. The weirdest lie a man has ever told me was that he was born in the Dominican Republic and in Haiti. Yes. This man is so special that his infant body blessed two countries. You’d think he was Jesus. What he actually meant (and I later discovered) was that his mother was in a Haitian airport waiting to take a flight to the Dominican Republic. He was in fact born in Haiti. He just didn’t want to admit it because of his Dominican pride.
Alas, that’s just the tip of the iceberg. Like I said, men have quirky imaginations. Here are seven of the weirdest lies men have told women.
Liar, Liar, Pants on Fire! 1 of 8
Are you okay with men who lie? How about odd lies? You better be. Hold on to your seatbelts and check out this slideshow.
Photo Credit: Flickr Creative Commons.
I Am Kind of Asexual 2 of 8
"I am kind of asexual." Wait. Can you be kind of asexual or are you just lying? Last I checked, someone who is asexual is not interested in sex..at all. I don't think any woman would willingly be with a man who claims to be asexual. Unless she's asexual. I asked the fine young woman who heard this fib straight from her then boyfriend's mouth. She said she loves sex. I spot a liar! Photo Credit: Flickr Creative Commons.
The Air Conditioner That Disappeared 3 of 8
A friend of mine was dating an ex...again. She went over to his place for some sweet loving and cuddling and noticed his air conditioner was missing. When she asked what happened to it, he said, "The person who lended it to me wanted it back." Wait, what? Someone lended you an air conditioner? Something in the milk wasn't...fresh. "We were sweating our butts off," she told me. "It didn't make any sense!" She was right. There was more to this tale of cool-air thievery. Her then ex (and now ex again) had to return the air conditioner to a woman he was dating simultaneously. A woman scorned left him hot and bothered...literally. Photo Credit: Flickr Creative Commons.
Convenient Allergies 4 of 8
If a man would say, "I'm allergic to condoms," I'd assume it was the truth. Why? I wouldn't think men would want to risk their health for a night of passion. I don't believe they'd want to deal with a baby (and baby's mother) nine months later. Plus, there's a high likelihood that I'd say no to sex and instead say, "Next!" Still, a woman said a man she was dating fibbed about this particular allergy. It's not outlandish, but it is deceptive and odd. Photo Credit: Flickr Creative Commons.
An Ethnic Slap in the Face 5 of 8
In college, there was a hot athlete that I longed for. He was a ladies man. He was so confident that he didn't have to lie about who he was. Or so I thought. You see, when I met Mr. Big Man on Campus he told me he was Puerto Rican. He even tried to woo me in Spanish. I believed him. Not all Latinos are fluent Spanish speakers. Besides, his goatee must have been from an island in the Caribbean. But it was all a lie! He said, "I'm Puerto Rican," when in fact he was a white boy. There's nothing sexy about lying about where you come from. Photo Credit: Flickr Creative Commons.
Pappa Can You See Me? 6 of 8
This one came from Jezebel. A man the writer dated told her that he was color blind. Why would any man say that? What's the point of this odd lie? Perhaps to excuse himself from complimenting her new and atrocious hair color. Nope. Just to lie! It makes no sense, y'all. And that's why it's so weird! Photo Credit: Flickr Creative Commons.
Just My Fifth Cousin 7 of 8
While on a stroll down Main Street (doesn't every town have a Main Street?) you catch your guy snuggling with another woman. He's holding her hand and they hug as they stop for ice cream. You confront him and ask, "Who is this woman?!" He looks at you like you're the crazy one. "It's my fifth cousin." Oh, you think. "Well, I'm so sorry long, lost cousin! Carry on!" Only she's not. His family isn't really that close. Photo Credit: Flickr Creative Commons.
Overwhelmed by Powerful You 8 of 8
Often times, men lie to get out of being with a woman. "It's not you, it's me." "It's bad timing." We've heard it all. One of my friends, however, dated a man who said the following: you're so powerful that I don't think I can be with you. Who does he think she is? A witch? Oh, men! How I love thee even with your strange lies. Photo Credit: Flickr Creative Commons.