Prior to getting married I didn’t have many serious relationships. I know exactly why. I was afraid to commit. Why? Because I didn’t think I could do it. My own mindset, or my own subconscious led me to actions that proved time and time again that I couldn’t commit.
Then I gradually realized I could not only commit, but I wanted to commit. It was a night and day difference, and it soon led to me proposing to my wife and getting married. Once I had this mindset shift, I was married within six months, and we’ve been together ever since.
We are our own worst enemies:
According to an article on YourTango.com, our actions reflect what we truly feel within us. What we desire is what we push ourselves to achieve, and that desire is often founded on all the wrong reasons. This is exactly what happened to me. There was really nothing wrong with commitment, it was just the narrative I created in my head.
Maybe the same is happening to you.
Are you the reason you are still single?
For me, part of the reason was my surroundings; very few of my friends committed in relationships. Part of it was that it was easier not to commit — at least I told myself that. Now that I’m married, being committed is just as easy, if not easier than not committing in a relationship.
You are the key to having a committed relationship:
So what narrative have you been building up in your mind? Love is hard? Love hurts? Relationships are too much work?
Don’t believe the hype. Be willing to change your mind. Be willing to commit. You may have to step out of your comfort zone, but you can change the narrative in your mind when it comes to relationships. This will ulitmately change your relationships status from single to in a committed relationship, or even married, if that is what you desire.
How has your mindset negatively impacted your relationships?
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