Many years ago (too many to count) I watched the classic romantic comedy, When Harry Met Sally. As I was cuddled up on my sofa, my ears perked up when Harry said the infamous line, “You realize of course that we could never be friends.”
While Sally renounced his theory — “That’s not true. I have a number of men friends and there is no sex involved” — I thought of my own male friends. I have maintained a platonic relationship with them all. No sex. Not even a peck on the lips on a drunken night.
So, he is wrong, isn’t he? Can men and women ever be just friends?
Harry’s conclusion is based on one thing — sexual attraction. It doesn’t matter if you’ve never been intimate with your male BFF. It cannot be a true friendship “because no man can be friends with a woman that he finds attractive. He always wants to have sex with her.”
I’ve come up with a solution to this conundrum, which has plagued man and womankind since 1989. Here are my tips for maintaining a platonic relationship with the opposite sex.
1. Befriend a Man Who Isn’t Your Type
None of my male friends are my physical type and I am not their physical type. It’s not necessarily strategic, but I do know that if I meet a man I’m attracted to, I’m going to want to seduce his fineness. So, if I’m not attracted to you, we can be friends! This guideline is as much for me as it is for him (I will jump your bones).
2. Get a Gay BFF
One of my closest male friends is gay. I didn’t seek him out because of this but it has worked out swimmingly. He and I check out men together. And I am pretty sure he won’t ever jump my bones. Unless he’s fighting me for a hottie. Then all bets are off!
3. Your Best Friend’s Guy
Many of my married friends have great husbands that I also consider my friends. One in particular always asks about me. We even go out together, I being the unfortunate third wheel. I don’t necessarily have a separate relationship with him, but I can go to him when I need male advice. He’s a great guy and his wife loves that her husband and her best friend have a friendship as well.
So, I am proof that Harry was wrong. It isn’t impossible for men and women to be friends. Nothing is impossible. Just make sure that he’s an unattractive gay male who is married to your best friend.
Oh. Wait. Damn you, Harry!