It’s a question that’s probably crossed just about every couple’s mind: What’s the formula to a happy, long-lasting relationship? Considering the nearly 50 percent divorce rate in the U.S., it doesn’t seem like there’s any precise formula. Or, if there is, at least half of U.S. couples don’t know about it. There are constantly studies, research, and opinions offered about what makes a happy couple. I’ve said before I don’t hang my hat on too much of that stuff. But hey, it is “science.”
The Huffington Post recently wrangled a handful of such studies that reveal the supposed formula for the happiest relationship ever, and they’ve listed them in this article. Among the traits of the happiest couple ever are: they contribute equally to the household, they’re more similar than they are dissimilar, they’re are sexually active, they’re first-born and last-born pairs, and they have similar spending habits.
Although I agree with some of the points in the roundup, as many hold true for my marriage, there are others I can’t fully believe in. I’m not sure my wife and I are the happiest couple ever, but we’re committed to each other, and we are happy, and we are constantly growing.
Here are 4 ways my relationship differs from the “happiest relationship” described in this report:
1.) We text a lot.
One study that the Huffington Post lists reveals the happiest couple is not big on texting. We are really big on texting. In fact, we really only call one another when we need something immediately or in an emergency situation. I understand how texting can be damaging, and we should probably text less. But it has become a big part of our relationship.
2.) We have three children.
Another study says the happiest couples are childless. But my wife and I have three children, and honestly I don’t think our relationship would be the same without them. They add dimension to our relationship, and they bring out other parts of our character to love.
3.) We are married.
Science says marriage doesn’t matter when it comes to being the happiest couple ever. I strongly disagree with this. If we were not married, we’ be lacking a big part of our relationship: the commitment. Before marriage, I was not fully committed, but when I decided I wanted to get married, I said I was committing to her and only her. Without it, our relationship wouldn’t be as happy if we were even still together.
4.) We’re different people — in many ways!
The article points out that the happiest couples are a lot alike. Well, we don’t fit that bill. I’m the planner, while she’s the “what plan?” person. I prefer early mornings; she doesn’t. I love sports, and she could care less. I like running, but she likes biking. The list goes on. However, we are no less happy that we are opposites. In fact, our opposite interests and personalities help us become more happy!
What can help you become the happiest couple ever?
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