I thought I pulled off a wedding in a record amount of time when I planned and pulled off — like so many women before me — a shotgun wedding in less than three months.
But when I came across this blog post yesterday, I realize I had nothing on this woman.
Paula Rollo, a blogger and mother of two over at Beauty Through Imperfection, may just take the cake for the world’s fastest walk down the aisle:
She said “I do” only 35 days after meeting her husband-to-be on their first date at Starbucks. Oh, and did I mention she was only 18? Or that her husband never actually officially proposed? The plot thickens, my friends…
So what in the world was she thinking? Was she completely crazy? Did the marriage work out? Does she have any regrets? Read on for an interview with Paula…the real “runaway” bride.
Can you explain more about how you both mutually decided to get married?
This is a really hard point, because really, we didn’t talk about it much at all. We chatted about everything under the sun and at some point we stopped saying “you” or “me” and started saying “we.” Talking about what “we” are going to do later in life, etc.
I remember at one point, saying to him, “if you are thinking/feeling the same thing that I am … it would be OK with me if you called and asked my parent’s permission.” He looked at me with wide eyes and didn’t say anything for awhile. I was starting to think I had misread the situation when finally he responded with, “Actually, I’ve already been praying about that, can I get their number from you?” I was floored!
Were you disappointed at all that you didn’t get an “actual” proposal?
Not at all! I was so wrapped up in my own personal fairytale that it didn’t bother me. It’s OUR story, so it doesn’t matter that it doesn’t look the same as every one else’s! Proposal stories are sweet, and I love hearing them, but they aren’t an essential building block to a healthy relationship, so I don’t feel like I’m missing anything important. My husband means more to me than a thousand “official” proposals.
How did your family and friends react?
There were responses all across the board. Some were worried, some tried to talk us out of it, some were thrilled and some mutual friends had even seen it coming. Two of our really good friends had a conversation before I even moved back into town (so he and I hadn’t met) saying that we would be perfect together.
Since you got married so soon, what surprised you the most about your husband during your first year of marriage?
Honestly? His kindness. Everyone always talks about fighting and marriage, as if they go hand in hand, so I was pleasantly surprised to find that they don’t have to! (Side note: I wrote a post about this here.) We’re almost 5 years in and we’ve yet to have a huge stereotypical fight. We disagree, sure, but we’re always able to stay civil and talk things out until we’re able to come to an agreement. I’m not saying it’s all been easy — we’ve had more hard times than I can count, but even when we don’t see eye to eye we always know that we’re on the same team, fighting together and not against one another, and I think that helps!
What would you say to your daughter/son if they came to you and wanted to get married at 18 after only 35 days?
This is something I’ve thought about a lot actually, and I guess I would have to go along with it. I would hope that at that point I would have raised my kids well enough to trust that they know if it is right or not. I would of course have lots of questions and want to get to know the person as much as possible, but I suppose in the end they would have my blessing as long as there wasn’t anything terribly wrong with the situation.
Would you change anything about your relationship timeline?
We eloped, and while I don’t regret that, I wish we would have had some family there. It was a precious day and I loved everything about it, but that’s the only thing I regret. We just didn’t plan ahead enough! But I’m hoping to one day have a vow renewal ceremony so that we can celebrate with family and our closest friends. Which will be neat in its own way, because when we renew our vows we will REALLY know what we are vowing. No one can describe how wonderful and sometimes difficult a marriage can be. It’s just not something you can explain to someone who hasn’t done it. We certainly didn’t know the gravity of our vows when we said them, though we meant them with our whole hearts. It will be neat to say them again, understanding another layer of depth to the promise that we’re making.
What did your actual wedding day look like?
It was a Monday morning and we drove downtown in his truck to the courthouse and got married! We actually forgot our rings, so we had to drive home after and pick them up from his mom’s house after we were married. We were both in jeans and regular t-shirts, but it was wonderful. I remember smiling through happy tears as we got married. It was really special!
Did your Christian faith have any influence on your decision to get married so quickly?
In a way I guess it did. We definitely knew that God had brought us together, so that helped us be more confident in our decision. At one point my husband just said, “Why are we practicing dating when we know we’re going to get married? Let’s just get married so we can practice at that instead!” That’s ultimately what we ended up doing and it was great for us. It’s certainly not for everyone, and we’ve had some hard times that came because we got married so young and so fast, but we’ve also had some really amazing things that happened for the same reason. A healthy marriage will always be hard and all kinds of wonderful regardless of the timeline! Our story is definitely unique but it’s our story, and I love it!