Once upon a radio show, a host asked me if I’d forgiven my ex-husband. I was in the role of expert for that segment, offering up tips on how single moms can tend to themselves when their children are away at school, camp or the other parent’s house. The host, also a coach, followed it up with an offer to guide me through the healing process of forgiving him.
While my immediate reaction was to laugh out loud, the slow and strategic response to her question is this: I don’t need to forgive him — at least for some of it. But I also don’t need to hold on to the anger — at least not all of it.
Here’s how I learned to differentiate anger and forgiveness, to decide which parts to hang on to, and how the remaining bits have helped me heal, strategize and move forward as a single woman and mother.
Have you forgiven your ex? Was it a necessary step for you in moving on?
Read more of Jessica’s adventures as a single mom in the city at Sassafrass.