When it comes to marriage or relationships in general, the word “own” doesn’t typically come to mind. Marriage is between two equal people, after all. Relationships don’t put one person above the other, right? So ownership doesn’t apply, right?
Today, I published a post on my blog written by Regi Campbell. Regi is the creator of Radical Mentoring and the author of What Radical Husbands Do. In the post Regi asks the question, “Who owns your marriage?”
Before you take this and run with it with the wrong impression, this is not to say that men own women or anything related to that. However, the points made in the post show why it’s important that men own their marriages.
What does owning a marriage look like?
There are many different types of ownership and many different things a person can own, but the main idea around ownership is responsibility. When you own something you take responsibility for it.
Think about driving your parents’ car as a teen in comparison to when you paid for and owned your own car. There’s a difference.
Think about renting an apartment compared to the time you closed on your first house. There’s a difference.
The same thing happens in marriage, which is why you want him to own your marriage. A man who owns his marriage takes care of his marriage on a different level. He doesn’t want anything to happen to it. He will work hard to make sure it is as good as it possibly can be.
What is the result of him owning your marriage?
When he finally steps up to own your marriage, he changes and your marriage changes. Here are three things that happen as a result of him owning your marriage:
1. He commits to you and the marriage
Once a man owns something, he commits to it. A marriage void of commitment is a marriage doomed. When he commits like this, he won’t let anything come between you and him, or your marriage.
2. He gets rid of excuses
My wife and I had a conversation yesterday about some things I was doing that bothered her. My first instinct was to make an excuse as to why I did or didn’t do it, but I had to own up. I realized it was important to her, and as her husband, I had the responsibility to take owernship.
3. You can be real with him
Have you ever wanted to say something, but didn’t? Using the example above, my wife was honest and real with me because I was taking ownership. When your husband takes ownership, you can speak the truth in love, even when it hurts, and he’ll handle it.
Ownership in marriage is not a bad thing. Wives should want their husbands to own their marriages, and husbands should want to own them. Great things come when this happens.
Can you think of another benefit as a result of a husband taking responsibility in marriage?