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The 5 Biggest Bedroom Buzzkills

By Lori Garcia |

Your bedroom is supposed to be a haven o’ rest hot sex, but for many folks, it’s just another room that happens to contain a bed.

If you’ve ever wondered what (or who) is to blame for your lukewarm sex life, Redbook offers up these 5 common bedroom habits responsible for ruining our collective sex lives – check them out after the jump!

Little bedfellows: Of course your kids want in your ginormous bed, but there’s a time for everything. Reserve your snugglefests for mornings and keep your kids out at night. Joel Block, a sex therapist and author of Sex Comes First: 15 Ways to Save Your Relationship Without Leaving Your Bedroom says, “By the time the kids go to sleep, couples are just about done.” True dat. Stick to a consistent and reasonable bedtime with your kids to allow for quiet time together as a couple when the lights go out.

Antisocial media: Most of us are guilty of going to bed with our Facebook friends and Twitter followers, even if only figuratively. Kick your friends and followers out of bed in favor of the person right next to you. We promise the world won’t stop turning.

Over accessibility: We get it, you’re connected. Whether by text or email, you can always be counted on for expeditious replies to urgent matters on everything from boyfriend trouble to email forwards. Unless you have legitimate reason to be on-call, step away from the mobile devices. That funny email and autocorrected text can wait.

Serious talks in bed: My husband is famous for this. We can go all day with light and airy convo only for him to hit me with, “Hey, you think we should try to refinance the house?” once we’re in bed. Hey, you think we can talk about this another time? Dr. Block suggests saving heavy convo for daylight hours outside the bedroom.

Too much good TV: TV is just. so. good. And thanks to the DVR, it’s even better with an endless stream of recorded awesomeness paired with the ability to zip through commercials. Dr. Logan Levkoff, a sexologist and host of Café Mom’s Mom Ed: In the Bedroom suggests keeping the DVR outside the bedroom and setting limits on TV watching. Sure thing, right after this episode…

I’m four for five on this list but only because I’m not a fan of the elbow boob jabs that come from kids in my bed. So this is what I’m gonna do, I’m going to try like hell to break these bad bedroom habits and get back to you with my progress. I can’t promise a steamy sex diary, but I can promise an update. Stay tuned.

Are you guilty of these bedroom buzzkill habits?

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More on Strollerderby:

5 Ways to Gauge Your Marital Health

Behind My Bedroom Door

15 Sweet Ways to Show Him Love

The 25 biggest male turnoffs
20 things you should never say in bed
20 guys you need to break up with… NOW
The 17 biggest lies we tell our spouses
20 funny excuses women give to get out of sex

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About Lori Garcia


Lori Garcia

Lori Garcia is a writer and mother of two living and loving in Southern California. When she's not fussing with her bangs, you can find her shaking her groove thing on her personal blog, Mommyfriend where she almost never combines true tales of motherhood and mayhem with her degree in child development. Read bio and latest posts → Read Lori's latest posts →

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3 thoughts on “The 5 Biggest Bedroom Buzzkills

  1. Charlie says:

    I blog during coitus. You’re saying I shouldn’t be doing that?


  2. Pixie says:

    And #6) go to bed at the same time.

    My husband stays up until midnight and later. We have 3 boys and he wants them in no later than 8 most nights. I have to be up early or they’ll kill eachother. So wtf? We no longer have a relationship. This isn’t the only reason to blame but it started. There is also the little fact that he has done less and less around the house and with the boys as time goes on. I resent him for that he resents me because I’m not working. My boys are 11, 6, and nearly 1 years. When’s he’s home alone with them he’s put one down for a nap sent one out to play and taken a nap himself. Now that there are 3 he refuses to be alone with them something I have to do everyday.

  3. Linnel says:

    Actually it`s REALLY something ese how men can`t do or should I say won`t do what we do when it comes to the kids…He has to start doin something to

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