There are moments now, at nearly 3 months postpartum, when I breathe a deep sigh of relief that I am no longer pregnant.
You see, my entire pregnancy, from week 4 right through until the bitter end, was pretty miserable. From April, until December, I suffered with hyperemesis gravidarum, which left me pretty useless as an active parent to my toddler.
Every time he asked me to go outside and play, I had to put the duties on someone else, because I was just too sick. There was no summer swimming, no playing in the sandbox, and no walks in the park. He always had his father, or my parents to do those things with, but it wasn’t me.
After missing so many of the great moments that made up last summer, I am absolutely thrilled with the recent hints of spring. Yesterday, I went outside with Evan to play, and it was so wonderful to be able to be fully present with him in that experience, with no horrible nausea haunting me. We ran, we laughed, and we threw leaves. Life doesn’t get any better than that!
After having two pregnancies with severe morning sickness, I know that I can’t go through it again. I can’t push the pause button on myself with two children, it just wouldn’t be fair to them.
Did you feel like you neglected your older children when you were pregnant?