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Bad Santas: Toddlers Screaming on Santa's Lap… But Can You Blame Them?

The scariest Santa Claus EVER.

I read somewhere that watching kids scream on Santa’s lap is one of the only things that gets better about Christmas as we get older. It’s true… Unless maybe it’s your own kid freaking out.

Truth be told, I was actually a little disappointed when Violet didn’t provide me with the stereotypical kid-screaming-on Santa’s-lap photo.

I can understand the tears. I mean, let someone hand you off to a strange, hairy man and see how you feel about it. Also, there are some pretty creepy Santas out there, people.

I rounded up some photos of kids screaming on Santa’s lap, but these aren’t just your usual run-of-the-mill kids crying snapshots.  When you get a load of these Santas you’ll understand what all the blubbering is about.

Yikes.  Billy Bob Thornton and his Bad Santa have nothin’ on these guys.

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  • You Okay, Santa? 1 of 25
    You Okay, Santa?
    Perhaps he hit the hooch a little too hard before his shift?
    Image: TheChuckler.comt
  • Santa on Crack? 2 of 25
    Santa on Crack?
    Santa looks wired, yo.
    Image: TopTenz.net has the most excellent gallery of kids screaming on Santa's lap. Check it out.
  • Santa is Going to Kill You 3 of 25
    Santa is Going to Kill You
    He sees you when you're sleeping...
    Image: TopTenz.net has the most excellent gallery of kids screaming on Santa's lap. Check it out.
  • Anyone have a flask? 4 of 25
    Anyone have a flask?
    Another Santa who must've been hittin' the sauce a little too hard. Can you blame him?
    Image: TopTenz.net has the most excellent gallery of kids screaming on Santa's lap. Check it out.
  • Santa on Work Release 5 of 25
    Santa on Work Release
    They let him be Santa Claus if he promises to go right back to jail at 9pm.
    Image: TopTenz.net has the most excellent gallery of kids screaming on Santa's lap. Check it out.
  • He Knows When You’ve Been Bad or Good… 6 of 25
    He Knows When You've Been Bad or Good...
    So be good for goodness sake! I'm begging you! Please!
    Image: TopTenz.net has the most excellent gallery of kids screaming on Santa's lap. Check it out.
  • Santa Is Angry 7 of 25
    Santa Is Angry
    This photo was taken seconds before Santa stood up, kicked over the chair and walked out of the mall.
    Image: TopTenz.net has the most excellent gallery of kids screaming on Santa's lap. Check it out.
  • Santa, You’re Hurting Me! 8 of 25
    Santa, You're Hurting Me!
    The Santa who likes kids just a little too much.
    Image: CreepySantaPhotos.com has the best gallery of scary Santas. Click over and check it out!
  • Santa Is So Over Christmas, Y’all 9 of 25
    Santa Is So Over Christmas, Y'all
    Is my shift over yet?
    Image: TopTenz.net has the most excellent gallery of kids screaming on Santa's lap. Check it out.
  • The Horror 10 of 25
    The Horror
    I will never get over this photo. These kids probably still have nightmares about that Santa. Christmas probably makes them break out in hives. Image: TopTenz.net has the most excellent gallery of kids screaming on Santa's lap. Check it out.
  • The Original Bad Santa 11 of 25
    The Original Bad Santa
    Had to slip this one in there.
  • Mean Santa 12 of 25
    Mean Santa
    Mom! Santa's pinching me!
    Image: Ellen.
  • Paroled Early 13 of 25
    Paroled Early
    Santa's first job after jail.
    Image: Ellen.
  • Maniacal Santa 14 of 25
    Maniacal Santa
    Santa just told that little girl he killed Rudolph.
    Image: SketchySantas.failblog.org
  • My, What Big Teeth You Have, Santa 15 of 25
    My, What Big Teeth You Have, Santa
    All the better to eat you with, my dear!
    Image: SketchySantas.failblog.org
  • Dead Santa 16 of 25
    Dead Santa
    It took Mrs. Claus and the elves several minutes to notice Santa had passed on but little Timmy knew it right away.
    Image: SketchySantas.failblog.org
  • Grabby Santa 17 of 25
    Grabby Santa
    Someone better check the sex offender registry.
    Image: CreepySantaPhotos.com has the best gallery of scary Santas. Click over and check it out!
  • Wherein Santa Plots to Destroy Christmas 18 of 25
    Wherein Santa Plots to Destroy Christmas
    That boy isn't smiling in fear, he's grimacing in pain.
    Image: CreepySantaPhotos.com has the best gallery of scary Santas. Click over and check it out!
  • Evil Santa 19 of 25
    Evil Santa
    Santa knows where you live.
    Image: CreepySantaPhotos.com has the best gallery of scary Santas. Click over and check it out!
  • Santa, You’re Under Arrest 20 of 25
    Santa, You're Under Arrest
    Seconds after this photo was taken cops burst in and arrested Santa for breaking and entering. Except this Santa wasn't delivering gifts.
    Image: CreepySantaPhotos.com has the best gallery of scary Santas. Click over and check it out!
  • Tired Santa 21 of 25
    Tired Santa
    Close your eyes all you want, Santa. I'm not going anywhere until you promise me a doll.
    Image: CreepySantaPhotos.com has the best gallery of scary Santas. Click over and check it out!
  • Words Escape 22 of 25
    Words Escape
    I'm going to have nightmares tonight.
    Image: CreepySantaPhotos.com has the best gallery of scary Santas. Click over and check it out!
  • Jailbird Santa 23 of 25
    Jailbird Santa
    Another Santa out on work release.
    Image: CreepySantaPhotos.com has the best gallery of scary Santas. Click over and check it out!
  • This Ain’t Worth Minimum Wage 24 of 25
    This Ain't Worth Minimum Wage
    Seconds after this photo was taken Santa's head exploded.
    Image: CreepySantaPhotos.com has the best gallery of scary Santas. Click over and check it out!
  • Walmart Santa 25 of 25
    Walmart Santa
    Walmart already features the scariest people I've ever seen so this Santa almost seems appropriate.
    Image: CreepySantaPhotos.com has the best gallery of scary Santas. Click over and check it out!

 

 

 

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