But one enemy has infiltrated my home front slowly and with fox-like cunning. It seemed harmless at first, and therein lay its greatest strength.
What is this foe, you ask? A mean mom from the neighborhood, or her little bully child? A message from popular culture that has brainwashed my offspring? The musical stylings of Justin Bieber?
No. My greatest enemy is the kid’s meal toy.
We try to avoid fast food. Honestly. But there are times when I can’t resist the siren song of a double cheeseburger meal, or I give in to the whining from the backseat. When we travel I have been known to throw some business in the direction of a drive through in the interest of time.
And those little plastic toys? They pile up.
I’m not sure if I’ve mentioned to the Toddler Times crew that we’re preparing for a move. We’ve started packing up the house in boxes cast off from the liquor store (because everyone knows they have the best boxes). And one thing’s unavoidable when you’re packing up your life: existential questions that arise from all of the junk you seem to have accumulated.
If we are what we possess then I’m a closet full of black pants I never wear and more Happy Meal Toys than there are fish in the sea. I’m not proud.
So I’m fighting back. The Kid’s Meal Toy Eradication Plan of August 12 begins now.
Are you with me?
Mary Lauren Weimer is a social worker turned mother turned writer. Her blog, My 3 Little Birds, encourages moms to put down the baby books for a moment and tell their own stories. Connect with her on Facebook and Twitter.
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