Why Moms Who Care About What Other Moms Do, Drive me Nuts

Little Bean in his PJs at dinner last night.

I’m writing this in response to Jen’s post Why over Achieving Moms Drive Me Nuts on Babble Kids. She gave me a good chuckle as I don’t consider myself an overachiever mom (OAM) overall, but I have OAM tendencies. Although not in the birthday/holiday department, there I’m clearly a slacker but in day-to-day looking for some fun way to spend time with my kids and figuring out how to get them to eat healthy, I overachieve. For Pete’s sake I just posted 10 photos of my son using a spoon. Yea.. I’m a dork.

Why should I be ashamed? Since when does a mom who cares TOO much a bad thing?

Do I think Mom’s who make “lunch meat origami” are crazy? Sure, but sometimes I put cards in my kids lunch and make heart shaped sandwiches for Valentine’s Day. I’m not ashamed. He came off the bus with the biggest smile that day.

Do I think Mom’s who have crazy themed parties and dress their kids up in wacky outfits have too much time on their hands? Yea, sort of, but it makes them happy and I get a good chuckle at the pictures, so why should I care?

My point is both the OAM and the Slacker Mom care. Sure, Slacker Moms may not buy Halloween costumes until the day before trick-or-treating. They may forget to pick up Valentines to hand out at school or haven’t mailed out thank you cards for her soon to be 7 year old’s 6th Birthday. Maybe they are the ones who’s toddlers are in PJs at dinner because they didn’t bother to get them dressed that day. (None of these examples are based on myself. Nope, not one, and if you try to get me to confess, I’ll deny it. Deny it all! *evil laugh*)

What drives me nuts are moms trying to make other moms feel bad or guilty or stupid for caring about their kids. Why does everything need to be a competition? Hey, I’m not immune to this phenomenon. Totally guilty as charged in the omg-did-you-what-so-and-so-did-for-junior department but I’m trying. I’m trying to let it all go because OAM and Slacker Mom alike both care. They care in their own ways. Let’s give each other the benefit of the doubt for a change, and just stop judging.

Side note: I think I’ve noticed the more confident I get as a mom the less I care about how others parent their own children or what they think of the way I do. Thoughts?


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