I’m a first-time parent and as such, I’m basically just learning all this stuff as I go. One thing that I have learned pretty quickly is that toddlers are a bossy bunch. I’ve decided that a large part of it stems from the fact that they have limited speech capabilities and can only focus on the words that will get them the things they need and want. Who needs prepositions? I’m pretty sure toddlers genuinely believe that if they shout something loud enough or repeat it often enough, their wishes will be granted… or at least I’m pretty sure that’s what my toddler believes.
We don’t give in to a good chunk of her emphatic requests (“Chochate! Chochate mama!”), but most of the things my daughter says to boss my husband and I around aren’t particularly rude and, in fact, a lot of them are pretty endearing. So I thought I’d share a few here! I’m sure soon enough the bossiness will be less cute, but for now I kind of think these emphatic requests are a little bit cute.
Things My Bossy Toddler Says 1 of 11
Toddlers really are the bossiest. Here are 10 things my toddler says in her attempts to boss us around on a daily basis. Also...I really love this photo of Fern. It was when I dressed her up like "The Dude" from the Big Lebowski — complete with White Russian (i.e. milk that she spilled everywhere). A semi-irrelevant fact, but I thought it was worth noting, since it is the photo you'll see throughout the slideshow. And now, on to the bossy toddlerisms.
"Dance!" 2 of 11
Toddler dance parties happen at least 8-10 times a day in our house and our daughter does NOT want anyone to miss out on the fun and will implore us to come join her by pulling our hand and repeating, "Dance! Dance!" until we give in. Also, when this happens she is quite specific in the fact that everyone must dance. Not just one of us. Both my husband and myself must join in the merriment. Even our dog isn't off the hook and is forced to dance, much to her dismay.
"Boos-on" 3 of 11
"Boos-on" = boots on = "Put my rain boots on and take me outside to play in the backyard with the chickens."
"Pocket!" 4 of 11
If you are a fan of Mackelmore, then you know the "Thrift Shop" song. It is one of Fern's favorites and she would listen to it on repeat all day long if we would allow it. And apparently she is picking up on the words, because she's started referring to it as "Pocket" (there's a line in the song that says, "...only got 20 dollars in my pocket...") and will insistently repeat it to us over and over in an attempt to get us to play it for the umpteenth time that day. "Pocket! Pocket! Pocket!" Ahhhh!
"Hey Hey!" 5 of 11
The other favorite song on Fern's list? "Blurred Lines." I know, I know. Don't judge. She loves it though and requests it in the same fashion as the "Pocket" song all the time by shouting, "Hey hey!" at us.
"Peanut Buddah" 6 of 11
"Peanut buddah! Peanut buddah!" Translation: "Make me a peanut butter and jelly sandwich right this very second or I may self-implode."
"Push da button" 7 of 11
Fern has discovered the button on top of our toilet that you push to flush. Luckily she can't reach it or she'd be busying herself with water wasting like there was no tomorrow, but it doesn't stop her from insisting that I push it for her over and over... and over. "Push da button! Push da button!" Oh toddlers.
"Wah-dun" 8 of 11
"Wah-dun" = wagon = "Let's go for a walk to the park and you can pull me in the wagon. You're welcome."
"Fix it!!!" 9 of 11
This is one of my toddler's most insistent demands. One of her favorite things to do is to take things apart and then put them back together. The only problem is that she hasn't really mastered the putting things back together part of the equation. That's where my husband and I come in and are expected to be the fixers of all things... 18,000 times in a row. The monotony!
"Pu-dit-on" 10 of 11
During the day, Fern will bring me articles of clothing and accessories that she would like me to either A) put on her, or B) have me put on myself. I hear, "Pu-dit-on mama," quite a few times during the course of a typical day.
"Sit down" 11 of 11
"Sit down mama! Sit down da-da!" For some reason we are required by this new toddler management to sit down on the floor next to her at random times of the day. So what if you're stirring that pasta sauce! You must sit down immediately. The toddler demands it.
Has your toddler started being bossy yet?
Lauren Hartmann is the founder of The Little Things We Do, a blog about life and adventures in Portland Oregon. Follow her on Twitter, Facebook, Pinterest and Instagram or catch up on all of her posts here on Babble. More from Lauren: