I’m happy. I’m writing- something I’ve dreamed about since I was a little girl. I have three special- no spectacular- kiddos, and for the most part I’m able to balance it all fairly well.
There are dirty dishes in the sink sometimes, slammed doors and skinned knees. I have the typical worries and anxieties, yes. And sometimes at the end of the day I wonder how I’ll be able to drag myself out of bed the next morning and do it all again.
Thanks to the honesty of bloggers, though, I’ve realized that all of this is normal, and in the grand scheme of things I’ve got it pretty good.
I’m lucky and I’m grateful.
What I’m the most grateful for, though, is the guy who chose me.
It’s hard for me to believe that the college kid in the Birkenstocks and beat up Phish hat is now, 12 years later, my husband, and that he’s, you know, a dad.
He’s not just a dad, he’s a great dad.
My husband spends his days caring for his patients in a busy family practice office, then comes home and immediately takes the children out of the house so that I can have some quiet. Before bed he reads Harry Potter to our boys and makes sure there’s a glass of water by my side of the bed. In the winter he scrapes my windshield and in the summer he washes my car, and he only sometimes complains about the the fifteen layers of kid crap on the floor.
When you start a life with someone, you may know what kind of person he is, and what kind of partner he’ll turn out to be. But you can only guess about what kind of father he’ll become.
Parenting brings with it so much joy, but also so many opportunities for stress and disagreement. How does the way you were raised mesh with the way he was? Is he fun but irresponsible dad or dutiful but a stick in the mud? Does he give in easily or stick to his principles even when he’s wrong? What happens if your child is absolutely nothing like him? You never know until you’re living it.
Early in our marriage my husband made a choice for which I will always be grateful. Without hesitating for one second he joined me in parenting my nephew as our own child- even before we had biological children of our own. There are no words in the world to express that kind of love.
When I read this post on le petite rêve, I thought it was a sweet tribute and a wonderful idea. I’m not typically a fan of internet declarations of love for one’s partner (after all, why not just say it to the person privately?) but in honor of Father’s Day, I thought I’d share my own Things I Love about Him post.
In the comments, please feel free to share what you love about your partner in parenting. And happy Father’s Day Matt. Love you.
He Makes Time for Us 1 of 8We spend a lot of time together as a family, but he also makes it a priority to do things together as a couple- even if it's just sitting on the front porch together after the kids are asleep.
He’s a Fun Dad 2 of 8He's constantly joking with the kids and trying to make them laugh. They think he's hilarious.
He’s Supportive 3 of 8He has confidence in me even when I don't believe in myself.
He Challenges Me 4 of 8He's always pushing me and inspiring me to go for my goals.
He’s Invested in Our Kids as Individuals 5 of 8Not only does he challenge me, but he pushes the kids to do their best as well. While I'm more of an emotional support system, he's really hands-on about encouraging our kids to be the best little people they can be.
He Does All the Parenting Crap that I Don’t Want to Do…Like Getting in a Public Pool 6 of 8He cleans the poop out of the bathtub. He cleans up the dog barf. And if he weren't afraid of spiders I'm sure he'd kill them too (but I'll take him anyway).
We’re on the Same Page 7 of 8Of course there are things we have to talk through, but we compromise well and end up on the same page.
We’re a Team 8 of 8Not just the two of us, but the five of us. We talk to our kids about the fact that a family is more than a group of people who happen to live under the same roof.
Mary Lauren Weimer is a social worker turned mother turned writer. Her blog, My 3 Little Birds, encourages moms to put down the baby books for a moment and tell their own stories. Connect with her on Facebook and Twitter.
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