6 Easy Steps to a Gorgeous Christmas Wreath!

As you may already know, I am not what you’d call a crafty person. (Cunning, yes. But inclined toward making crafts, no.) We usually go half-assed or store-bought when it comes to things like holiday decorations.

But last week, I was feeling inspired. I’d noticed so many lovely (and not-so-lovely) wreaths on doors around town, that I was wishing we had one of our own. A real, evergreen one would have been ideal, but the $20 – $40 they can cost is a lot, given that they’re a one-time-use item.

Fake evergreen wreaths, on the other hand, can look very, well, fake. So I decided I would make a wreath — something simple, festive and tasteful that would last for years to come. Here’s how it went down:

  • 1. Off to the craft store! 1 of 7
    1. Off to the craft store!
    My plan was to find a basic vine wreath, and then trim it with fake berries or bows or ornaments or whatever else in the store caught my eye. So exciting!! I wore my pilliest sweater, just for the occasion.
  • 2. Look what I found! 2 of 7
    2. Look what I found!
    Everything was going according to plan -- vine wreath, fake berries, bow, all for under $25 total -- when I spotted an incredibly realistic-looking fake pine wreath. Complete with adorable, tiny little pine cones. And it was the last one. Fate!!
  • 3. Should I or shouldn’t I? 3 of 7
    3. Should I or shouldn't I?
    But -- damn -- $49.99. A lot more than I was planning to spend on my Awesome Homemade Wreath. But amortized over the 50 years I planned to use it, that was less than the price of a cup of coffee per year. How could I NOT buy it? (And it was *imported,* too! So exotic!)
  • 4. Score! 4 of 7
    4. Score!
    In an amazing feat of organization, I'd actually managed to bring a $10 off coupon with me. Which was fabulous. But when I got to the register I discovered that my dream wreath was HALF OFF!! (Which was extra nice given that I'd found a whole bunch of other stuff that I really, really needed.)
  • 5. Affixing the bow 5 of 7
    5. Affixing the bow
    Now, I put my crafting magic to work. I took the pre-made bow that I'd bought (complete with adorable jingle bells!) and affixed it to the wreath using the twist tie on the back. It wasn't easy, but I powered through. I couldn't wait to put my wreath up on the door, snap a pic, post it to Pinterest and start getting "liked" and re-pinned all the hell over the place.
  • 6. Doh! 6 of 7
    6. Doh!
    But when I went to hang up my Martha Stewart-esque wreath (Isn't it gorgeous? Aren't you jealous?) I remembered that our door is a piece of shit: it's metal, and filled with styrofoam. So you can't nail anything into it. Dammit!
  • 7. Stop 7 of 7
    7. Stop
    And, finally, this is my husband giving me his "please stop making me take ridiculous pictures of you for some stupid narrative slideshow" look. He doesn't give a crap whether we have a wreath or not. He just wants me to figure out a way to hang it the hell up so it's not sitting in the foyer getting in the way. (He just doesn't appreciate the crafting process.)


Bottom line: I’m awful darn proud of the thing. And look forward to enjoying it for the next 50 years.


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Article Posted 5 years Ago

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