Death by Sippy Cup DrawerJessie Knadler
Welcome to my Sippy Cup Drawer: a black hole of plastic cups, super spout 2-handlers, insulated cups, thermoses equipped with pop up straws, cups emblazoned with Dora, Mickey, Cinderella (and probably a burrowed nest of baby gerbils, but I don’t want to think about that), and for the life of me, I can’t find a matching lid to go with any of them.
Is this a conspiracy? Are sippy cup makers trying to destroy parents of America with this protrusion of confusing lid and cup choices?
I would like to submit a request to the sippy cup manufacturers of America, or more likely China:
Can you please standardize cups and lids? I don’t mind a wide variance in cup height and I place no restrictions on lid design — domed lids, nipple lids, lids that shoot confetti, I don’t care — but every lid must match the width and threading of every cup. Sort of like what the plumbing and piping industries have done with parts. Or how the plug people got together with the electrical outlet folks for a company retreat and came back with a neat standardized system.
As it is, sippy cups and the drawers that contain them are just anarchy, blatant disregard for efficiency, order and my two year old’s thirst. I’m about ready to take a flame thrower to the entire area except I’d probably cinge my pants and inhale a lot of toxic, cancer-causing fumes.
I’ve been on a campaign to purge my house of all the excess stuff but I’m half afraid of keeping the wrong lid with one sippy cup while tossing the lid of another. See? Pure anarchy. I’m also not wild about stumbling upon that baby gerbil’s nest.
The solution is clear. Toss it all — June is moving up to glass.