It’s Never Too Early to Teach Your Daughters

I’m sure you’ve all heard of the new Abercrombie push-up bathing suit for the third grade set. Parents are in an uproar about it, but not me. Nope, I say it’s about time someone started manufacturing push-up bikini tops for eight-year-olds. For years, I’ve noticed the glaring lack of padded push-up bikini tops for children. Do we really want our little girls looking forward to meeting their friends at the pool when they should be worrying about filling out a bikini with their prepubescent chests? It’s a crying shame when our young daughters are more concerned with jumping off the high dive than with looking sexy.

After seeing the ads for these swimsuits, I ran out and bought one in every color for my nine-year-old daughter. I had her try them on to make sure they made her look hot enough, but they didn’t. Something was missing. The thing about a push-up swimsuit is that you need something to push up. So I made an appointment with a plastic surgeon. I mean, what better candidate for implants than someone who’s completely flat, right? While I was there, I figured I might as well have him give her some lip augmentation as well. I certainly don’t want my daughter walking around feeling comfortable and confident in her body when there are so many things she can do to improve it.

I mean, for years I’ve been teaching my girls how to walk in uncomfortable, ill-fitting heels for the sake of vanity.

And I’ve made sure they know how important it is to never leave the house without makeup.

It’s only natural that I start getting my girls push-up bras and plastic surgery, don’t you think?  If I don’t, how else will they snag a boyfriend by the age of ten?

(No boobs or fragile self esteems were harmed in the making of this blog post.)

Check out Dawn’s latest book, You’ll Lose the Baby Weight (and Other Lies About Pregnancy and Childbirth) here!

Check out Dawn’s blog, Because I Said So here!

image from Abercrombie Kids website

Article Posted 6 years Ago

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