10 Real New Baby Moments I’d Like To See From Kim and Kanye

So. Kim Kardashian and Kanye West are having a baby. Now, I am a known Kardashian watcher. I’ve watched most of the various Kardashian reality tv ventures, partly in awe and partly in utter bafflement that there are people out there who really seem to make a living off of wearing false eyelashes and bickering with their siblings on camera. I could do that! Where’s my reality show contract?

I have to say, though, that the Kimye twist in the lives of the Kardashians left me with a big feeling of “meh.” It was then that the whole Kardashian enterprise jumped the shark for me and I stopped watching. It seems like it should be time for their star to fade, ya know? But with the advent of a Kimye baby, I’m sure there will be renewed interest in all things Kardashian. Kim will probably do a line of maternity clothes followed by baby clothes. And I have no doubt that Kim will give us some sort of reality tv glimpse into their lives as they welcome their little bundle in a few months. Maybe a series, maybe just a two hour special where she talks about nursery decor in her hushed voice, her lip liner and false lashes firmly in place. Kanye will make obligatory jokes about taking diaper duty and Kim will pose with the baby, both of them in coordinated ensembles.

And mothers of babies across the land shall laugh and laugh until we cry. Because that? Is not reality when you have a baby.

Here are the real life with baby moments I’d like to see from Kim and Kayne:

  • Diaper Blow Out 1 of 10
    Diaper Blow Out
    Imagine Kim, all decked out for a red carpet event, snuggling the baby for a good-bye kiss and KABLAM! Poop everywhere.
    Photo Credit: photo stock
  • Dinner Time Witching Hour 2 of 10
    Dinner Time Witching Hour
    You know how at 5pm babies start to cry and don't stop for hours and both parents are frazzled, with their nerves snapping, and ready to cry themselves? Let's see Kim and Kanye deal with that.
    Photo Credit: photo stock
  • Grabby Baby 3 of 10
    Grabby Baby
    Admit it. You'd laugh if a baby pulled out one of Kim's hair extensions.
    Photo Credit: photo stock
  • Boob Biter 4 of 10
    Boob Biter
    I hope Kim has a wonderful breastfeeding experience, I really do. I'd also love to see an outtake of her being bitten while nursing because we've all been there.
    Photo Credit: photo stock
  • Holy OW! 5 of 10
    Holy OW!
    I think Kanye's Twitter stream would be really awesome after the first time he snaps his finger in a car seat strap.
    Photo Credit: photo stock
  • Projectile Spit-Up 6 of 10
    Projectile Spit-Up
    I'm sure Kim and Kanye's baby will get to be part of many photo shoots. I also hope the baby finds ways to massively spit up during each one because what baby really likes photo shoots?
    Photo Credit: photo stock
  • Code Brown 7 of 10
    Code Brown
    How will Kim and Kanye cope the first time the baby poops in the tub?
    Photo Credit: photo stock
  • Installing Stress 8 of 10
    Installing Stress
    How many of Km and Kanye's cars will get outfitted with car seats? And what cuss words will Kanye say while trying to install them?
    Photo Credit: photo stock
  • Incoming! 9 of 10
    If they have a boy, I sure hope cameras capture the first time he pees in their faces during a diaper change!
    Photo Credit: photo stock
  • First Smile 10 of 10
    First Smile
    Yeah, Kanye may be all badass but I betcha he'll melt at the first baby smile.
    Photo Credit: photo stock


Article Posted 4 years Ago

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