10 Things This New Mom Never Wants To Hear Again

Having a baby opens up new avenues for awkward conversations with strangers. Before I had Tate, I rarely talked to anyone in public, which was fine by me. Don’t get me wrong, I love when people stop me and tell me that my son is beautiful. It’s the awkward advice and questions that get to me. (At least I don’t have twins, like Mary and Ronnie. People says some crazy stuff to mothers of twins.)

Without further ado, here are 10 things strangers say that I never want to hear again.

  • “You Look Tired” 1 of 10
    "You Look Tired"
    No woman has ever, in the history of time, ever wanted to be reminded that she looks as tired as she feels. If I look tired, lie to my face and tell me I look fabulous. That would make any mom's day.
  • “He Looks Underfed!” 2 of 10
    "He Looks Underfed!"
    Ah yes, you are so clever! We have a chubby baby, and you are the very first person to comment on it. Just give yourself a pat on the back right now.
  • “What’s Wrong?” 3 of 10
    "What's Wrong?"
    I have realized and am willing to admit that I don't always know what is wrong. Is he tired? Maybe. Is he hungry? Probably. Does he not like you? Also a distinct possibility. Sometimes kids fuss and cry, and I am done pretending I possibly know why. I just do my best to make him happy.
  • “I Don’t Mean to Be Rude…” 4 of 10
    "I Don't Mean to Be Rude..."
    First, can I just say that this is a absurd beginning to any sentence. It's code for, I am about to do something rude, I know it and am going to do it anyway and I would prefer if you didn't get mad.

    Second, people seem to only say this to me when they are about to seriously encroach on his (and my) personal space. If occurs to you that it's rude, don't do it.
  • “Is He Sleeping Through the Night?” 5 of 10
    "Is He Sleeping Through the Night?"
    This is the classic question to ask a new mom. Why, I'll never know. Most babies aren't sleeping through the night at first. And moms of older babies that still aren't sleeping through the night don't need to be reminded of how tired they are.
  • “Are His Feet Cold?” 6 of 10
    "Are His Feet Cold?"
    Yes, my baby doesn't often wear socks (and never wears shoes). But you see, I live in a sub tropical climate. It's hot 9 months of the year, and warm for 3. He doesn't need socks. So, no, I venture to guess when it's 85 outside, his feet are not cold.
  • “He Sleeps Where?!” 7 of 10
    "He Sleeps Where?!"
    I get that not everyone shares their bed with the baby. But sometimes it gets a little old when people constantly act bewildered at the mechanics of it. Yep, he just sleeps in our bed. Between us. Every night.
  • “He Won’t Always Be This Sweet!” 8 of 10
    "He Won't Always Be This Sweet!"
    Thanks, grandma-lady at the grocery store for reminding me that babies grow up. Believe me, I was a teenager and I know where this train is heading. I would prefer to just put my blinders on and not be constantly reminded that this kid is going to be an angst ridden teen that may want little to do with me.
  • “Where’s His Hair?” 9 of 10
    "Where's His Hair?"
    You got me. I have a bald baby. Yes, you are the very first personto compare him to a Cabbage Patch doll or Charlie Brown. Hope that makes your day.
  • “You’re Still Carrying Him? He must weight 20lbs!” 10 of 10
    "You're Still Carrying Him? He must weight 20lbs!"
    He weighs more than 20 lbs, thank you very much. Our babywearing relationship has shifted, but I still wear him often when we are out and about. To quote Rebecca, "It's my kid, and I'll schlep if I want to."

What things have strangers said to you that drive you crazy?

More on Babble: What NOT to say to a mom

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*In full disclosure, I know I sound super grouchy in this post. This can be explained by my writing it while grouchy. It’s also an attempt at sarcastic humor. So, don’t go jumping down my throat for being a jerk, mmkay?

Article Posted 5 years Ago

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