There’s a line from a Madonna song that goes “Hey, Mr. DJ, turn the record on, I wanna dance with my baby.”
Forget, for a minute, that the word “baby” here likely refers to some hunky, Madge-loving beaux…instead take it literally, and then imagine this: What if the DJ and the baby WERE THE SAME PERSON?
Mind blown, right?
It could happen a new class run by composer and DJ Natalie Elizabeth Weiss teaches babies and toddlers some of the basics of the art of disc jockeying. Curious tots get to play with real DJ equipment, get exposed to electronic music, and learn about mixing different songs.
The class is called, of course, “Baby DJ School.” Unfortunately, it’s in Brooklyn, New York, and that’s a bit too far from home for me to consider venturing there with Scrunchy Face. But if a class is ever established near us, I think my little guy would rock it…and I’m fairly certain he agrees.
Here’s what he’s told me — via our baby-mommy telepathic connection, of course — about why he’d make an awesome DJ.
Why This Baby Would Make an Awesome DJ 1 of 8
This baby is ready to make hot mamas everywhere shake their booties! Check out how Scrunchy Face makes his case for why he'd be a great baby DJ.
I Look Cute in Giant Headphones 2 of 8
OK, let's be honest. I'd look cute in anything, but these headphones are especially fetching, don't you think? If this DJ thing doesn't work out, I may pursue a career as an air traffic controller.
I Love Playing With CDs 3 of 8
They're shiny! Wait, what's this vinyl stuff you speak of?
No Bathroom Breaks Required 4 of 8
My diaper means you don't have to worry about me leaving the turntable for potty breaks...and no potty time means more party time!
Ready to Party All Night Long 5 of 8
Speaking of partying, I'll have no trouble keeping a DJ's late hours. Who needs sleep? (Besides cranky mommies...whatever, Mom.)
Buttons Are My Best Friends 6 of 8
I will never tire of pushing the buttons and knobs on fancy DJ equipment. I have taken on all the remotes and telephones in my house and WON....so bring on the MIDI Controller!
I Can Keep a Beat 7 of 8
Have you seen me in bouncer? I bop like a boss.
Three Words: Auto-Tuned Baby Babbling 8 of 8
How cool would it be if I set my ba-ba-bas and ma-ma-mas to a booming base beat? Maybe auto-tune them a bit, borrow a riff from "Old MacDonald" or some similarly other rocking jam...and voila! I'll have the hit of the year. Watch out, world -- this baby's ready to top the charts! Also: What are charts?
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