It’s been a month and I still can’t believe I have four children. Growing our family hasn’t been easy and so when I look at the four of them together, it is with such a sense of pride. Although our life certainly has changed with the addition of Silver, I can honestly say it’s all for the best. Yes, sleep-deprived and all.
When I was pregnant, I worried some about what life was going to be like with four children. I had a wonderful example of how to do it right — my parents had four children and I had a wonderful childhood. I still worried though. Four seemed like a large number, at least that was the impression I got when strangers would stop and ask me if this was my first. I wasn’t worried about caring for a newborn — that wasn’t new to me. But I was worried about how it would change our overall family dynamic.
Over the past month as a mom of four, I’ve learned a lot and I’ve been surprised by a few things, too.
1. My Youngest Fell In Love
I never had to deal with the jealousy phase when welcoming a new child, but I was prepared for that to happen. Since my youngest was going to be almost 5 when Silver was born, I was sure there would be some adjusting. I was wrong. She fell totally in love and is the one who’s the most helpful and involved with him.
2. The Crying Isn’t A Big Deal
I thought for sure that when the baby came my older kids would lose out on sleep, too — that they’d be upset by crying and all the fussing. But that didn’t happen. Over the past month, not only have they seemed unfazed by it all, they’re concerned and do what they can to help him.
3. The Kids Adapt — Well!
There has been so much change over the past month, from welcoming a new baby to mommy needing to rest and be slow for the first time as I recovered from a c-section. On top of all that, we took the kids out of public school and started to homeschool as well. They have taken to the change so well and it wasn’t expected.
4. People Are Caught Up On My Age
I have heard so many times how I “look too young to have four kids” and that has been really surprising to me. I didn’t expect that to be the number one reaction out of others, but it has been — hands down.
5. Multi-Tasking And Triage Are Marketable
I thought I was good at juggling all the things when I had three kids under 3 years old, but the truth is having four kids has made me even better at it. There has been a lot more come up now that I’ve got kids in different ages and stages vs. three kids in the same size diaper. I think the ability to triage and multitask are marketable skills that will come in handy in other times in my life, too.
6. The Age Gap? Not A Problem
I was really worried about the age gap between my oldest who would be turning 8 just days after Silver was born. I worried they wouldn’t be close and that Speed wouldn’t care for Silver, but I was so wrong.
7. It Is Not As Chaotic
I expected things to go insane. For kids to be mad at me. For me to get upset with how much has changed. But it wasn’t that bad. I am able to manage four kids — though it’s not without issues and challenges — and it’s not chaos all the time.
8. Pregnancy Was More Challenging
One of the biggest things I’ve learned is that pregnancy was much harder on my kids than a new baby, according to them. They are thrilled I am not pregnant anymore because they can climb and jump on me, I can pick them up and lay on my stomach, and they can, once again, fit in my lap.