Ignorance is Bliss: 10 Parenting Moments My Baby Won’t Remember (Thank Goodness!)

Baby girl
Please, God, let her not remember this hat

Baby Peony turns 1 this Friday (sniff, sniff) and I’m doing everything I can to ensure I remember every moment of her precious first year.

At the same time, I’m doing everything I can to ensure that Baby Peony doesn’t remember every moment of her precious first year.

Like these 10 moments. Please, God, let her forget these:

  • Bath time 1 of 10
    Bath time
    Or lack thereof, to be more precise. Not a week has gone by in her first year that I've bathed her more than twice, but it's generally been once a week. It doesn't appear that she's on the verge of losing any body parts because they've haven't been cleaned frequently enough. Nevertheless it's not something I plan on boasting about in any mom circles nor will I record the milestone in her baby book.
  • This hat 2 of 10
    This hat
    After you look at this picture, please destroy it so no evidence remains.
  • Letting her cry 3 of 10
    Letting her cry
    I straddle the line quite comfortably on the "cry it out" topic. I didn't let her cry at all when she was very little, but these days I find that she'll mostly work it out if I let her cry for a few minutes, whether she's in her crib and wants out or playing with toys and frustrated things aren't going exactly her way.
    Sometimes after I decide to check on her cries after a few minutes I'll realize why she's crying — like, she got her leg stuck in a piece of furniture or threw all nine pacifiers out of her crib. It's not so much the abandoned pacifiers that I'm grateful she won't remember so much as the imperiled limbs.
  • Her big sister 4 of 10
    Her big sister
    We finally moved Peony out of our room and into her big sister's room when she was about 10 months old. It's mostly been fine. But in those moments when it hasn't been — like the night she was crying and after I gave in from my "let the girls work it out on their own" stance, my husband walked in on our older daughter repeatedly hitting Peony on the head with a flashlight — I was pretty much ready to hand in my Mom Resignation Papers.
  • Letting her sleep in a closet 5 of 10
    Letting her sleep in a closet
    It's not like I shut the door or there were mothballs in there. But when we were at my parents house and she wasn't quite 6 months old she just wouldn't go to sleep anywhere but in her car seat, and anywhere but in the closet.
    Don't ask how I figured that out.
  • Moments like this one 6 of 10
    Moments like this one
    It's not as if I enjoy hearing a child of mine howl in distress. But sometimes when I know she's just fine, I like to snap a photo because she's just so pathetically cute when she cries. While I know she won't remember the moments I let her cry so I could pause and take a picture, clearly this is proof that I did it anyway. Hopefully she'll enjoy the images someday just as much as I do.
  • Changing her diaper 7 of 10
    Changing her diaper
    I'm neither proud nor ashamed of some of the places where I've changed her diaper in public. You do what you have to do.
    Except for the time we were at the New Orleans Zoo and without even checking I decided the bathroom was the least desirable place to change her diaper. So while we were in the comfort of an air-conditioned restaurant, I changed her diaper as she remained in her stroller. Unfortunately it happened to be a rather, uh, messy diaper.
    It's not that I think the other patrons minded (although I can surmise they probably weren't exactly tickled at the sight), but I have to imagine she might not have been thrilled had she been aware that I was letting her hang out so awkwardly for the world to see, and that I risked some cross-contamination on her stroller.
  • Rolling off the bed 8 of 10
    Rolling off the bed
    I knew I shouldn't leave her on my bed alone because she had just started rolling over. But one afternoon I really had to pee and I asked myself what the chances were that she could roll over onto the floor before I was finished.
    As it turns out, the chances were really good, and I caught her as she was falling off my bed. Which means she didn't actually fall. OK, technically she fell, but at least she didn't land.
  • Forgetting food and water 9 of 10
    Forgetting food and water
    I'm pretty over carrying around a diaper bag. So I keep diaper supplies in the car and occasionally carry a little Ziploc bag with a few necessary items when I'm away from the car.
    But what I often forget when I don't have the stocked diaper bag are snacks and water. Now that she's eating all real food it doesn't really matter, but there was a time when we'd be out and about for hours and I'd have to improvise to keep her fed and hydrated in ways that'd have me wiping the sweat from my brows and worry that someone might be calling Child Protective Services on the baby's account.
    Actually, can we not talk about this anymore, please?
  • Her 1st birthday party 10 of 10
    Her 1st birthday party
    It hasn't even happened yet, but I can tell you what she can expect not to remember: Anything.
    It's not just that I'm all tuckered out from my older daughter's 4th birthday party earlier this month. But I just don't really see the point in going all out for an occasion that is meaningless to the person of honor. We'll still do the cake smash and get her all dolled up, but that's pretty much it.
    Since she won't remember anything, is it really so bad that she'll have nothing to remember anyway?
    Photo credit: iStock

Photo credits: Meredith Carroll


Article Posted 4 years Ago

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