Mom Blahs: How to Cope With Feeling Stuck In A RutRebekah Kuschmider
Maybe the best thing bout pregnancy is how goal oriented it is. There’s the big end game, of course: labor and delivery of your little one. But along the way there are smaller milestones. Starting a new trimester. The first kick. Doctors appointments where you get to hear the heartbeat. Ultrasounds. There is a distinct sense of forward motion.
Then there’s motherhood. After the first whirl of bringing home baby and adjusting to the magnificent chaos of life with a newborn there’s that towering sense of accomplishment when you finally feel at ease in your new normal. You did it. You are a mom. You live mom, breathe mom, eat mom, sleep mom. It’s all mom, all the time.
Sometimes, you grind through your days as a mom and wonder what happened to the giddy anticipation you used to feel. Where did the wonder of the moment escape to? Did it drown in spit up? Get buried under Cheerios? Is it somewhere in the back of the car, tossed among the teething toys and Laurie Berkner CD cases? Why isn’t this more exciting?
I’m totally stuck in that rut. I was in high motion for the past year what with pregnancy then birth then the new school year for my son and the election. But now? Now that everything has settled down? Blah. I’m blah.
Fall and winter are hard times to be a parent. The weather makes it hard to get out and about as much as you’d like and the short days and early darkness can get oppressive. Sure, we can all look forward to the holidays but even that can feel like more work in a cycle of mothering in which the work never ends. And after New Year’s it’s a long slog until spring.
What’s a mom to do?
I find that creating events and rewards for myself is a huge motivator. Coffee with a friend. A shopping trip on payday. Planning a visit to see family. It doesn’t have to be anything major – just a point in the near distance to focus on as I trundles though my days. Put enough of those together and it’ll be spring before I know it!
What do you do to get out of the mom-blahs?