The Facebook "Hot Mom" Just Can't WinLizzie Heiselt
Oh dear, people. Oh. Dear. Are we really doing this? Are we really getting after this lady for owning her body? Are we really calling her a bully and a bad mom? Because she takes care of herself? Because she makes it a priority to get her workout in every day? Because she’s not afraid to say, “Hey, it’s hard, but it’s worth it”?
Because isn’t that all she’s saying? That she has three young boys, but she still takes time for herself and that she’s happy she does? That’s the message here, right?
And the hubbub that has come from it all the accusations that she doesn’t take care of her kids, the subtle hints that maybe those boys aren’t all hers, the blatant name calling (“self-righteous idiot”? Really?), aren’t those just indications of our own insecurities and reflections of our jealousy?
People, our country has a weight problem that costs hundreds of millions of dollars a year in health care expenses. So why do we hate on people who actually work to not be part of that problem? Why do we bully people who are disciplined and hard-working? Why do we feel threatened when someone actually does what we wish we could do?
Honestly, how many of you have ever said, “I wish I had abs like that.” Or, “What I wouldn’t do for those legs.” Or, “Look at those guns! I’d kill for those!” And yet, the moment someone says, “Hey, if I can do it with three young kids at my feet then it’s totally possible,” we get all up in her face and tell her she’s part of the problem the fat shaming problem, or the bullying problem, or the “mean mom” problem.
It does feel like Maria Kang just can’t win. I mean, she obviously prioritizes fitness. She does her best to stay strong and healthy. And how many moms at the playground tell her they “hate” her because she still looks so good after having three kids? How often do people tell her they wish that they could look like her? Then, when she says, “Hey, you can do it too!” they tell her she’s fat shaming them and to stop showing off.
It is true, of course, that not everyone can look like “hot mom” Kang. Even if they did work out for an hour a day and eat well. Not everyone wants to look like her. But I think it is fair of her to say that if you did want to be strong and fit and healthy (not necessarily with tight abs and toned arms, but still strong and fit and healthy), it’s possible. Even during the child-bearing years of your life.
And yes, maybe she could have been more tactful in her photo caption. And maybe a little less showy in her wardrobe choice. Maybe she could have not even pretended to apologize in her non-apology apology on her Facebook page and just told it to us straight. But then, maybe she knows by now that no matter what she does, people are going to be offended. And they’re going to see what they want to see and draw their own conclusions. She’s better off sticking to her guns, holding to her priorities, and confidently living her life the way that’s best for her as we all should.