So much depends upon a kiss. A kiss can trigger a flood of neural messages and chemicals that transmit euphoria, sexual excitement, and feelings of closeness. Research has proven that a bad first kiss is enough to derail an otherwise promising relationship. In a Gallop poll, 59 percent of men and 66 percent of women admitted to losing interest in a person they were attracted to after their first kiss.
With all of this scientific data on the importance of kissing, I’m surprised that so many couples neglect this important part of their relationship. As newlyweds, my wife and I never missed a chance to kiss and embrace. In fact, some people even had to ask us to tone it down. After a few years of marriage, things started to cool off. Pretty soon, we found ourselves kissing out of obligation and our kisses became rather platonic. When we realized that we were going through the motions and missing out on true connection, we decided to remove (or limit) these 3 types of kisses from our romantic repertoire.
The Passionless Peck
This kiss happens between your returning home from work and asking about dinner. You both pucker up, stand far part, and plant a dry kiss on the tips of each other’s lips. I’ve seen more passionate kisses at the county fair kissing booth. However, many couples find this type of kiss to be convenient because no clothing is wrinkled, no makeup is smudged, and the kissing quota is met for the day.
The Friendly Cheek
I kiss distant relatives, friends and babies on the cheek. Lips are reserved for my wife. I remember the first time I got the friendly cheek. I leaned in for a deep kiss only to find that my wife had turned her head. I immediately start to worry about the state of our relationship and my personal grooming. Had I done something wrong? Were my lips chapped? Did my breath stink? Was she mad at me? (BTW – I often get the cheek when she’s mad at me). Now, I’ve learned to avoid the cheek by maneuvering through the minefields of “I’m not in the mood” and “I’m upset with you,” and plant one squarely on my wife’s lips. My effort has a way of easing tension and making us feel like a married couple instead of roommates.
The Air Kiss
This is probably the worst type of kiss because no physical contact occurs. Instead, the sound of a kiss is released into the cosmos hoping that it will reach it’s intended target. This kiss is often perpetrated as one or more person is in a hurry or headed out of the door. Reserve this type of kiss for celebrities and people who like to say ciao.
If you and your spouse are guilty of greeting each other with these types of kisses, don’t fret. It’s not too late to rekindle the romance. Simply, pull your spouse close to you in a sensual embrace and give him/her a deep, long, passionate kiss (at least 20 seconds). Repeat at least once daily. These intimate kisses may feel uncomfortable at first, but the more you do it, the more you will wonder why you ever settled for the lackluster ones.
Photo by Wixphoto via Freerangestock