Marriage brings a lot of positive attributes into your life; never being alone, living with your best friend, having another person to help you with whatever struggles you may be having, and many, many more. But even though marriage has many positives, there are obviously some tough parts of marriage and I learned about those tough parts early on in my marriage. In fact, my first month of marriage was a real eye opener. I learned pretty quickly that there were parts of marriage that took some getting used to, but that’s just a part of marriage as well. Eventually I learned to adjust to those difficult parts, but I still get reminders of them every now and again.
Here’s my list of the top 10 most difficult parts of marriage:
Money 1 of 10
The most difficult part of marriage is learning that both parties now own the money in the bank account. Figuring out when I could spend money without permission, or how much I could spend, was a difficult adjustment.
Independence 2 of 10
Marriage is great because it means I have someone with me all the time, but on the other hand, I have someone with me ALL THE TIME. Getting used to having my wife around on a consistent basis was wonderful and difficult at the same time. Losing that sense of independence was a tough adjustment.
Entertainment 3 of 10
My wife and I don't like a lot of the same things and it has been an adjustment to set some of my likes aside until I do have alone time. For instance, my wife can't handle a certain zombie TV show, but I love the show. I have to wait until my wife is gone before I can watch it and my wife has the same problem when she wants to watch her show about top models.
Career Battles 4 of 10
Most of the fights in my marriage used to be centered around the career battle and it still rears its ugly head once in a while. Those fights focus on who has the most difficult day-to-day tasks, who works the hardest, and why that person should have a break from whatever extra task needs to be addressed in the marriage.
Personal Belongings 5 of 10
A year doesn't go by where we don't have a fight about who has more crap stored out in our garage and why the other should have to dump that stuff in order to make room for more stuff.
In-laws 6 of 10
Visiting the in-laws can be difficult and not because I have anything against my in-laws, because I don't. But they're not my parents and my parents aren't Casey's parents. The in-laws want to spend as much time with us as possible, but it has been a battle with each of us lobbying on why each set of in-laws should get equal time.
Chores 7 of 10
The house has to get cleaned and the lawn needs to be mowed and nobody is going to do it for us. Figuring out who is going to do what and when around the home can sometimes turn into a battle.
Styles of Parenting 8 of 10
Casey and I were each raised by parents with very different styles of parenting and we each adopted a form of those styles when we had kids. Figuring out which style is the best style for our own children has been challenging and it has taken some trial and error on both our parts.
Intimacy 9 of 10
Intimacy is a difficult struggle throughout marriage. It has the potential to lead to all kinds of problems that can torpedo a relationship. Intimacy is like a language, only neither spouse speaks the same version of that language. Trying to translate that language into something workable can be tough on both spouses.
Lifestyle 10 of 10
Casey and I each have different lifestyles. I like to be physically active and eat lots of meat and potatoes. Casey doesn't like physical activity all that much and she prefers to eat fruits and vegetables. Combining the two lifestyles into one that we can both live has led to a few fights.
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