This New Book Is Full of the Most Hilarious Kid Quotes — and We Can’t Get Enough

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We’re all too familiar with the phrase “kids say the darnedest things!” The way their minds work will never cease to amaze us.

Greg Dunbar and Alyssa Cowit, of hysterical Instagram account Live from Snack Time, decided to compile all of those funny quotes they’ve heard into a book titled I Did My Homework in My Head (and Other Wacky Things Kids Say), which they released on April 4.

Image source: Clarkson Potter | Greg Dunbar | Alyssa Cowit

Dunbar tells Babble it all started with Cowit’s Twitter account, where she would feature quotes straight from her kindergarten classroom. Dunbar suggested expanding to Instagram with photos alongside the quotes, and it’s been a success ever since.

The user response speaks for itself — with 60.7K followers to date! So it’s only fitting that they creating a book.

Image source: Clarkson Potter | Greg Dunbar | Alyssa Cowit

It’s divided into different topics — from love to growing up. And my personal favorite portion of the pocket-sized book is the celebration category, with quotes like “For my birthday this year I want an apple juice relax party,” and “You’re lucky you get to celebrate Christmas and Harmonica.”

Naturally, Cowit and Dunbar have their favorites. Cowit says, “The quote that really inspired me to document what my students were saying was ‘My butt has a line of symmetry.'” Because who wouldn’t find that inspirational?!

She continues, “After a geometry lesson, I asked my class what they could take away from the lesson, and a student raised his hand and blurted that out.”

As for Dunbar? “I have to go with ‘I have two grandmas. One that picks me up and one that has a mustache.’ The honesty is just brutal,” he says.  Oof. Poor grandma!


Image source: Clarkson Potter | Greg Dunbar | Alyssa Cowit

Cowit is continuing to capture quotes from her classroom — not to poke fun at them but to encourage the kids to be inquisitive.

“I do sometimes laugh at these comments, but I also take them seriously. A reading lesson could easily turn into a conversation about how women have eggs but we don’t lay them like chickens,” Cowit explains. “My lessons can get way off topic quickly, but these moments are just as valuable.”

I truly respect how Cowit handles these situations. I mean it’s very difficult not to burst out into laughter when a child looks at you and says “My brother was born naked,” but to instead turn it into a lesson.

And that’s her goal. If she could achieve one thing from publishing this book, it would be to see “adults take the time to work through emotions, problem solve, and answer questions in entirety.” Whereas Dunbar’s main goal is to make “someone, somewhere, laugh hard enough to spit milk out of their nose.”

Now excuse me, while I try not to spit water all over my keyboard while reading this hilarious book.

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