52 Thoughts I Had While Watching ‘Project Runway’, Season 16, Episode 9

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Oh, man. I don’t know about you, but I feel like I’m still in shock after last week’s cliffhanger of an episode. TBH, there were moments when I wasn’t sure whether I was watching Project Runway or Real Housewives, but I seriously enjoyed every single minute of it.

In case you missed it, Shawn freaked out 8 minutes into the challenge fell on a sword for Claire, and forfeited the head-to-head challenge in order to let her sister continue on with the competition. Claire wound up winning, Michael and Margarita got butt-hurt that her look may or may not have been a knock-off, and Michael stormed off the stage right in front of the judges.

The drama was delicious — but it left off just as Michael was about to call Claire out for all her dirty little tricks. And I can’t WAIT to hear what he has to say this week.

  1. So I’m trying to keep a straight face during Michael’s dramatic venting sesh, but my eyes keep trailing off to the guy in the “Nailed it!” T-shirt. (Anyone else?)
  2. I can’t believe Margarita is refusing to throw Claire under the bus to Heidi, after complaining about her to anyone who would listen all week long.
  3. Meanwhile: Batani has no qualms about spilling ALL the tea.
  4. Okay, now we’re getting to the dirt …
  5. Whattttt … Claire snuck a tape measurer back to her hotel room?!
  6. Whattttt … and she writes measurements on her hand to sneak into the work room?!
  7. This is actually taking me back to 8th grade algebra and giving me all sorts of belated guilt.
  8. Yolanda to Michael: “Are you a judge on this show or are you a participant?” — Oof.
  9. Hmm … the judges are getting mighty defensive of Claire.
  10. I am LIVING for Kenya’s facial reactions to literally everything that is happening right now.
  11. Serious q: I wonder if this would have gotten as heated if $25K wasn’t at stake.
  12. Eh, probably.
  13. Okay, Tim’s here with his concerned face, and it does not look good.
  14. Omg Claire confessed to breaking the rules.
  16. … And somehow Margarita looks more upset about it than she does?
  17. Claire: “These are the worst possible circumstances to leave this competition. But … that’s how my story’s gonna end.” — Oh god, this is actually quite depressing.
  18. Mostly because she just kissed away $25K and now nobody gets it.
  20. I feel like I just spent eight episodes cursing those twins and now I actually feel sorta bad for them. Or at least one of them.
  21. Bright side: At least they only had to be apart for seven days. I’m not sure Claire could have lasted on her own much longer.
  22. OMG and Batani is saved!
  23. Well that was quite a turn of events.
  24. Okay, deep breaths: It’s a new week, and a new challenge.
  25. Oh man, these little Shopkins-obsessed kids are so adorably excited right now, I can’t. This challenge is a like a breath of fresh air after all that drama.
  26. Okay, so Michael’s client Roxy is kind of the best. How many kids born after the millennium even know what a disco ball is? They barely even know what landlines are.
  27. Guys, I can’t tell: Does Brandon’s client like chocolate?
  28. Hand to God, I hope Brandon ignores all of her direction, because by the looks of that sketch, he’s gonna send a model down the runway in a straight-up poop dress.
  29. “It needs to be fierce.” — I take it back: Kenya’s client is my new fave.
  30. LOL to Kentaro rolling around on the floor under that giant roll of tulle “like a butterfly!”
  31. My actual heart just melted when I saw the note of inspiration Kenya’s client left her: “DRAMTIC.” Gotta love those 4th-grade spelling skillz.
  32. I can see everyone’s clearly mourning the loss of Claire today. (HAHAHAHAHA.)
  33. Kenya: “You know I’m just so extra, Tim.” Oh we know, Kenya. We know AND WE LOVE IT.
  34. Things that confuse me: Michael thinking a jumpsuit that looks like “a disco ball melting on the body” is a good idea. Lord, I hope he surprises me.
  35. Guys, what’s going on? I’ve never seen Brandon so at a loss before.
  36. And Michael is totally relishing his struggle right now.
  37. DYING over Kentaro asking Kenya if she wants to go to the sauna … and Kenya hearing, “Do you want to go eat salmon?”
  38. Kentaro: “HAPPY MERRY CHRISTMAS!” — This needs to become a thing.
  39. Michael is getting too catty. I’m not sure how I feel about it.
  40. Getting a very intense Strawberry Shortcake slash Little Bow Peep vibe from Ayana’s look.
  41. Ayana: “It’s a lot and very little at the same time.” — That’s one way of putting it.
  42. Runway time!
  43. Okay, don’t get me wrong. I love Brandon … but has he ever created a look that didn’t involve long strappy sash thingies hanging off it in some way?
  44. Batani’s dress looks like a bunch of holiday bows got in a fight and every single one of them came out the loser.
  45. Ooooo totally Loving Kenya’s look! Super classy.
  46. Also a fan of Margarita’s. It’s kind of all over the place, yet everything somehow makes sense?
  47. Liris deserves all the awards for walking down the runway in that crazy-looking cupcake dress and totally killing it.
  48. Kentaro’s is like a pretty ballerina got married. I’m into it.
  49. Well, Michael definitely achieved the melting disco ball look.
  50. … Andddd he’s the winner! Honestly didn’t see that one coming.
  51. Oh jeez, how depressing for Batani to be rejected two weeks in a row.
  52. OMG WHAT. They sent home Amy too?! Nooooo!!!!

Sigh. Guys, I’m legit sad right now. I loved Amy. And I was definitely not emotionally prepared for a double-elimination this week. On the bright side, though: At least we still have Kentaro. He can honestly never go home, or I will weep.

… ’til next week!

You can catch more episodes of Project Runway every Thursday at 9/8 central on Lifetime.

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